My wife's just walked out on me, saying she cant take any more of my insufferable nit picking.
I think you'll find there's a hyphen in nit-picking.
I'm making a cookie brand called NIT (new incredible taste). It will be shaped like a chocolate chip cookie and will contain a fortune on the bottom.
FortuneNIT for you.
Q: How many managers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. At least 4, plus a victim. One to hire the victim to screw it in for them, a second to supervise the victim, a third to start nit-picking about the way the bulb is being screwed, and a fourth to screw the victim by firing him. They take the credit though none of them actually touched the light bu...
My wife said she’d buy her next phone based on how bright the display is...
... but I think that’s just nit-picking
A dog walks into a natural history museum
Asking for a piece of the new dinosaur exhibit to prove an important theory
In return the dog offered what looked like a tiny black speck encased in amber
The research assistant was visiting from Ireland and was very much out of his intellectual depth. Not wanting to seem ignorant, the...
Little Jimmy was in school the next day and his teacher told the class they were going to focus on a new word for the day: "Contagious".
The teacher gave the class ten minutes to come up with a sentence containing the word of the day. When time was up, she asked them each to come up and read ...
Once after a heavy snowfall i was riding with a female co-worker. The roads had not yet been cleared of snow but we pushed ahead regardless, all the cars following in the same ruts. At the intersection the snowplow passed and left a pile of snow in front of us. We blew through it but it stalled the ...
My father was hit by a car while he distracted by cleaning lint out of his pocket.
My mother always said it would be his nit-picking that would be the end of him.
I met a part time body builder today, who happens to also be a Rabbi...
he's an absolute *Jew*-nit
My wife left me a note saying “I want a divorce,
I’m already seeing someone, you’re not a good husband and I can’t deal with your nitpicking anymore.”
So then I called her and said “Nit-picking has a hyphen in the word.”
Obama was scheduled to visit a Catholic church...
An aide to President Barack Obama visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral in Washington. He told the Cardinal that President Barack Obama would be attending the next mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Obama to the congregation and say a few words that would include cal...