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I am over 18

I love how the ninja turtles wear masks

Great way to hide your identity, it's not like you're a giant fucking turtle or something

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Why did Quentin Tarantino regret directing a Ninja Turtles movie?

Because he felt the villains being called "The Foot Clan" was very misleading.

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Why were the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arrested for terrorism?

They’d been radicalised.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I am over 18

I don't know why people keep asking if one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is gay.

They have a strict "Don't Ask Donatello" policy

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Why was the little boy too scared to reach into his Happy Meal for the Ninja Turtles toy?

Last time he did it, he got a Splinter.

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What’s the Ninja Turtles favorite brand of saki?

Oroku, because it shreds.

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Shredder finally defeated the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

All he had to do is to throw a box of plastic straws to the sewer system.

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The Ninja Turtles went to a weapons store. They all got what they wanted except for Raphael

They didn't have his sai's.

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The ninja turtles and master splinter were found dead in their lair...

The police ruled the deaths as sewer-cides.

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Why do the ninja turtles make terrible office mates?

They always destroy the shredder.

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Mr. T set the ninja turtles up on a blind date.

Mr. T: Here's your girl.

Ninja Turtles: who is she?

Mr T: Its April, fools.





Also, I'm sorry.

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Why do the Ninja Turtles attack Shredder 4 on 1?

Because their master is a rat.

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I spent the whole day trying to carve the Ninja Turtles out of wood

But just ended up with a load of Splinters.

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Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list?

Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell.

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Some bloke just told me I have no culture

Just because I can name more ninja turtles than renaissance artists.

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Chuck Norris once flushed a condom

Three weeks later the ninja turtles were born

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