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The Life Saver

>A father walks into a bookstore with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, he starts choking and goes blue in the face. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts to panic, shouting for help.
>
>An attractive, well-dressed but serious looki...

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I took a Life Saver from a girl's back pocket at work.

I got fired for her ass mint.

My mate Dave drowned...

For his funeral, we got a wreath in the shape of a life saver.

It's what he would've wanted.

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A Man Has Promised His Wife He Wouldn't Get Drunk Anymore

But his best friend is getting married and he decides to have just one drink at the bachelor party during the toast.

Well, one drink leads to another and the man falls off the wagon ... HARD! He's singing and dancing and stumbling his way around the party without a care in the world (or his h...

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Teacher: Today we will be working on our sense of taste.

Teacher hands the 1st student a red life saver.

Student 1: Cherry

Teacher hands the 2nd student a green life saver.

Student 2: Lime

Teacher hands the third student a clear life saver.

Student sucks on it but cannot give an answer.

Teacher: Hint, it is what y...

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A flea is sitting on a bench in Florida...

and he looks miserable. He has the sniffles, he's sneezing and has the chills. He has a blanket wrapped around him for warmth.
Just then a friend of his walks by and notices him sitting there all sick and dejected. The friend sits next to him.
"Liam! What's wrong? You look absolutely awful."<...

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