UPJOKE
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If you had invested $1000 in JP Morgan in 1882, today you'll be

D E A D

A rabbi goes into a bar

with a HUGE bullfrog on his shoulder. Bartender looks up at him, and says "Where in the WORLD did you get that thing????". Bullfrog answers "Brooklyn, they're EVERYWHERE!".



Credit to JP

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

When i go down....

Jean Pierre, popularly known as JP among his friends was a fighter jet pilot of the French air force.

One day he took his girlfriend to the park for a picnic. Since he wanted to be really romantic, he packed the picnic basket himself.

Hours later, JP and his girlfriend were having a g...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Three men went on a swimming competition. An American, a Japanese and a Filipino.

The rule was simple, swim through the lake full of alligators, reach the other side alive and win unlimited cash.

Confident, Phelps went first. But in the middle of his dive, a gator appeared in front of him and swallowed him whole.

The crowd was shocked, yet they all booed.

Eag...

Religious smoking joke

A Franciscan and a Jesuit were friends. They were both smokers who found it difficult to pray for a long period of time without having a cigarette. They decided to go to their superiors and ask for permission to smoke.

 

When they met again, the Franciscan was downcast. โ€œI ask...

Invitation to a Scientists' ball

Some of the replies from the scientists invited:

Pierre and Marie Curie were radiating enthusiasm.

Einstein thought it would be relatively easy to attend.

Volta was electrified and Archimedes, buoyant at the thought.

Ampere was worried he wasn't up to current re...

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