I heard Barcelona is ironing out a new deal with their best player.

It might get Messi

My wife always thinks really hard about ironing vs. putting her shirts in the dryer to get rid of wrinkles.

I asked her to not be so clothes-minded.

A man asks to his wife: why are you ironing the bra's if nothing is behind it?

A man asks to his wife: why are you ironing the bra's if nothing is in it?

The woman answers: i also iron your underpants right?

The cover on my ironing board was wrinkled

so I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of "irony."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A farmer is worried that his sex life with his wife is getting a bit dry (NSFW)

They go to see a therapist, who asks them what they think the problem is. The wife says, "I just don't have time for it, I'm too busy cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry and everything else. Sex is starting to lose its appeal".

The farmer is disheartened to hear this, but listens to the ther...

"Shall we try swapping positions tonight?" he smirked.

"Great idea!" She replied. "You stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!"

What is an ironing board?

A surf board which gave up on its dreams and went to work.

A man had bandages on both ears

His friend asked “what happened to your ears?”

The man said “I was ironing my clothes and then the phone rang so without thinking I pressed the hot iron to my ear.”

“Oh no that sounds terrible! But then why do you have bandages on both ears?”

“Well the burn was quite painful so ...

What do you call an ironing board that makes clothes wrinklier?

Irony board

A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son’s house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law said.

“I am wearing my love dress.”

“Love dress? But you’re naked!” said the mother-in-law.

“My husband loves me to wear this dress,” she explained.

The mothe...

A man walked into the ER with severe burns and blisters to both sides of his face.

He was quickly admitted. The attending physician asked him, “how on earth did you burn your face so badly?”

The man reluctantly began his explanation. “It’s actually kind of embarrassing doc. See my wife is out of town this week, and so I’m having to do my own cooking...”

“Ah, I see...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dear Dr. Jones, I'm writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years

He makes love to me regardless of what I am doing, whether ironing, washing dishes, sweeping, even sending e-mails, etc.

I would like to know if there is anything that ucnn hlp m wth nd f unothel gothsl ehj fpslth fjsl;s;;o{O} .lp sld mpskdli dlks; a;ld ;;'

Ccinsely ous,,, mdyl

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God and Jesus were ironing out the last few details of his life on earth.

"We just need to figure out your mode of death," God said. "We've narrowed it down to crucifixion or killer bees. Which do you prefer?"

Jesus thought about it for a few minutes and then said, "I think I'll go with crucifixion."

And that's why Catholics around the world make the sign of...

A strange woman approached me in a shady bar.

She winked, and said "For $50, darling, I'll do stuff for you your wife would never do."

I gave her $50, got her to do the ironing.

A friend of mine got married because he was tired of ironing his shirts...

now he also irons dresses

I saw an ironing board with wrinkles in it

I thought that was pretty ironic.

What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?

An ironing board's legs are hard to open.

My wife said she was feeling light-headed from a low iron level.

To help her, I raised the ironing board to a more suitable height.

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