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Illusionist Jokes

When one illusionist accuses another one of stealing one of his tricks...

It's up to the accuser to provide evidence before the magician's counsil that he came up with the illusion first.
It's called the burden of poof.

Did you hear about the illusionist who drove home drunk after a show?

He turned into a parked car.

What do you call an illusionist who performs tricks with numbers?

A math magician.

David Blaine might like to think he's the world's greatest illusionist...

But I can walk into any bar in the world and I become instantly invisible to all women.

Your move David.

What do you call an illusionist from Mexico?

A magic Juan.

3 blondes are lost in the desert

They come across a river that they have to get over, but it's swarming with crocodiles.

Luckily, a genie just happened to pass by on his flying carpet. He said: "Ah, you are lucky! As I have found you here, I will grant each of you one wish."

The first blonde wished she was an excellen...

An illusionist was employed to entertain the guests of a cruise ship.

He had a handful of good tricks he performed quite well and because there was a new audience every other week or so, he didn't have to worry about coming up with new ones. The trouble came when the Captain's talking parrot, after watching the same show time and time again, started to figure the tric...

A man wants to audition for a band...

The band has advertised that they're looking for a drummer. The man comes to the tryout, fully prepared with a truck full of instruments and his drum sticks. He waited in a long line to get through the door, and when it was finally his turn, he was ecstatic! The woman who was holding the tryouts ask...

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