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Humphrey Jokes

So Humphrey goes to the brothel..

After he chooses his favourite they go up to the room and she asks him:

So how you want it?

He answers: ah.. you know, they way I want it, you can‘t do it.

She asks again: but I want to give you the best experience possible. So tell me how you want it?

He sais again: ...

What do you call a camel with three humps?

Humphrey

Hump day joke.

A one humped camel married a two humped camel and they had a baby that had no humps. What did they name the child?

Humphrey.

Asking for a friend...

Please, I am very lonely and have nobody to talk to but my parakeet, Humphrey.

At least he won't annoy his co-workers every week.

What did the mother and father camel name their baby born without a hump?

Humphrey!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cork man on Mastermind

In a similar vein to the Irish millionaire joke posted earlier.

Mick from County Cork in Ireland is on Mastermind. His specialist subject: "the 1916 Easter rising". The questions begin.

John Humphreys: who was the leader of the military during the Rising?

Mick: Pass

John ...

A tale of two camels

Buddy of mine works at the local zoo. He's usually taking care of the camel they have there they call Sir Hump. They had been noticing that he was looking mopey and depressed so they brought in a companion. This female camel was named Lady Lumps. Anyways, Hump was finally acting normal again and soo...

The Flying Scotsman

Alex Salmond's colleagues decided it would be a worthy gesture to name a railway locomotive after him, so an official went to the National Railway Museum at York to investigate the possibilities.

"There are a number of locomotives at the NRM without names," a consultant told the official, but...

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