Scientists have recently discovered that 3 out of 5 habitual marijuana users developed over productive saliva glands.

When asked if anything can be done, one leading scientist advised, "Yes, you can either spit, or get off the pot".

What do you call a habitual procrastinator?

A pro procrastinator.

'Can't stop husband's habitual skirt chasing. What should i do?'

'Send him to Scotland'

I was once a habitual bottom flasher.

But, that was many moons ago.

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What do you call a Native American who's a habitual liar?

Shitting Bull

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In 1946, Sean Connery joined the Royal Navy...

In 1946, Sean Connery joined the Royal Navy. During his time there, he was in charge of a covert operation to spy on a Russian military installation which was directly next to a small lake.

He was in charge of a small team of highly trained soldiers, a few locals recruited to help with the op...

What kind of egg do you give to a habitual liar?

A fiberge egg.

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a dick's life

A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess. His family is nuts. His next door neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. His owner beats him habitually.

I don't know how anyone can take Putin critics seriously, with how stupid they are.

Keep in mind that these are the same people who habitually trip and fall backwards onto bullets and lock themselves in suitcases.

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A bear, a wolf, and a rabbit.

A bear, a wolf and a rabbit were traveling through the forest together.In order to survive more easily, they maintained a strategy by which everyone would contribute a little something to the group.The bear, being the strongest, hunted the for the most part, the wolf chased the ones who would try to...

Mr Connor took his daughter, Anna, to a Vietnamese church....

....in the hopes of getting her to stop her rebellious teenage shenanigans.
Anna obviously resistant, warned him beforehand that she'll go to the church, but she doesn't want to attend the church habitually.
Mr Connor agreed with Anna, hoping the one visit will be enough.
At the front of th...

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