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Economists Jokes

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Two economists are walking in a forest when they Come across a pile of shit.

Two economists are walking in a forest when they Come across a pile of shit.

The first economist says to the other "Ill pay you $100 to eat that pile of shit." The second economist takes the $100 and eats the pile of shit.

They continue walking until they come across a second pile of...

Chinese economist asks American Economist

The Chinese stock market experienced a drastic drop over the past 3 months. With most local economists failing to explain this phenomena, a renowned Chinese economist decided to albeit reluctantly phone up his American counterpart.

Due to the fraught ties between the two countries, the Chines...

Economists are struggling to figure out why girls with the least principle

Draw the most interest

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Two economists

Two economists are walking down the street and pass by a pile of dog shit. One of them (a sadist) turns to the other and says "I'll pay you $1000 if you eat that dog shit".

The other performs an internal utility calculation and eats the dog shit.

Continuing their walk, the second econo...

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Two economists are walking in the woods

Two economists are walking in the woods.

Suddenly, one notices a pile of bear shit next to the path. He says to the second one, "hey I'll give you a 100€ if you eat that pile of shit".

The second economist, being a rational decision maker eats it and gets a 100€. But he had a weird fe...

What do plumbers and economists have in common?

They both deal with gross domestic product.

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Two economists are walking in the woods...

Two economists are walking in the woods when they encounter a rotting deer carcass.


One economist turns to the other and says, "I bet you $4000 you won't sniff that carcass."

The other economist isn't going to turn down $4000 so he leans over and sniffs it. Then he turns to the fi...

DYK that if you lined up all the world's economists end to end...

...they still wouldn't reach a conclusion?

With climate change coming, economists predict that Canada will soon be the most powerful country in the world.

And then you all will be sorry.

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Two economists are walking in the park when they come across a pile of dog shit

One economist turns to the other and says, "I'll give you $500 if you eat that dog shit." Tempted by the sum, the second economist picks up the dog shit and eats it. True to his work, the first economist gives him $500 and they continue on with their walk.

After a while, the pair come across ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two economists are walking down the street and they come upon a massive pile of horse shit

Two economists are walking down the street and they come upon a massive pile of horse shit. One says to the other "I'll give you $20,000 if you eat that shit" so he does, and collects his money. They walk a while longer and come upon another pile of horse shit. The shit eater, wanting to get even, t...

An economists left leg is on fire and his right leg is frozen...

He says "on average I'm perfectly fine".

The CEO at Euro A Bank Ltd got economists thinking when he said:

"A cyclist is a disaster for a country's economy. He does not buy a car and does not take out a car loan. Does not buy car insurance. Does not buy fuel. Does not send his car for servicing and repairs. Does not use paid parking. Does not become obese.
Yes - and he stays well, damn it !! Healthy p...

How many economists are needed to run a country?

It doesn't matter, because nobody listens to them.

How many economists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know. They just keep going on and on about how the last one broke.

Why is it so hard for economists to go gluten free?

Because their food preferences are very sticky.

There were two economists who were shipwrecked on a desert island.

They had no money but over the next three years they made millions of dollars selling their hats to each other.

Two economists fall into a hole

they realize they are trapped, and so they come up with a plan. The first step in their plan is... assume a ladder.

Two genius economists were arguing about how incentives motivate changes in behaviour

Chinese joke from the 1990s.

Two genius economists A and B were arguing about how incentives motivate changes in behaviour. They walked past a pile of dog dung, and A said to B:

“I’ll give you 50 million dollars if you eat that pile of dog dung!”

B thought about it, worked out i...

How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Someone else has do it, because the economist won't know if the bulb is recessed properly until it has already been turned at least 2 quarters.

a group of mathematicians and a group of economists travel to a meeting by train...

a group of mathematicians and a group of economists travel to a congress by train

the economists all buy a ticket, the mathematicians buy a single ticket for their whole group

when the conductor comes around, the economists all show their respective tickets

the mathematicians on...

For all you economics enthusiasts

Three economists go hunting and come across a deer.
The first economist aims and fires but the bullets misses and goes a little to the left.
The second economist aims and fires but the bullet misses and goes a little to the right.
The third economist starts celebrating and exclaims “yaho...

A man is laying in the hospital, waiting to be the first person in history to receive a brain transplant...

A doctor comes in and says "Congratulations! But unfortunately since this is a new procedure your insurance isn't going to cover it all. So we're going to give you 3 choices for brains and you can decide which you can afford"

The man says to the doctor "Ok, what are they?"

The doctor s...

An old joke no one I know likes

Two economists are sitting on a bench. One says to the other "do you understand the economy?"

The other economist says "Let me explain, I'm an economist. It starts--"

The other interrupts "Oh no, I understand. I'm an economist too. We can both explain the economy, do you *understand* i...

It costs you nothing to be nice

and that's why economists say it's worthless

A broken clock is right twice a day.

Which makes it more accurate than economists.

True

You can lead a jackass to logic but you can't make them think.

If you laid all of the world's economists end-to-end they wouldn't reach a conclusion.

It is easier to tell a book by it's cover than without it.

If God meant for humans to fly He wouldn't have created so much traffi...

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