UPJOKE
carolhymnchristmasreligious songchoralfrench languagewassailinglyricbeethovensilent nightlove songsing alongopera housebrass bandmedieval

Christmas Carol Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This morning I dropped a copy of A Christmas Carol right on my toe

It hurt like the dickens

What is Kira from “Death Note”‘s favorite Christmas Carol?

The first no-L

What's a kidnapped child's favourite Christmas Carol?

Away with a stranger

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Covid Christmas carol

(Didnt know where else to post, remove if not allowed, got bored at home and this is result...)

[Chorus]
You better watchout,
You better stay inside,
You better go bulk buy,
And Im telling you why,
Cronavirus is coming to town

A mutating virus,
Its infecting twice,...

I just watched A Christmas Carol with Patrick Stewart.

What he’s doing round my house I don’t know.

What Christmas Carol is banned in the psychiatric ward?

Do you hear what I hear?

Just now, from my dad: Have you heard the new Christmas carol from India?

We Vishnu a Merry Krishnas.

I go around throwing a stone at anyone who sings Christmas carols before Thanksgiving. What is the name of this stone?

It's my Jingle Bell Rock.

PSA for the holidays

This holiday season, if you are doing Christmas Carols, please remember they are songs -- not people.

My dad's lame holiday joke

During the holiday season, a man is aimlessly drifting around a shopping center, wondering what to get his wife for Christmas. Wandering into a pet store, he asks the shop assistant, "Hey, buddy, you got anything with a Christmas-type theme in here?"

"Well, there is Chet, the parrot," the...

Christmas Carol not to be sung in Southern California...

Oh the weather outside is frightful...
But the fire is so delightful...
And since you have no place to go....

Well,I Decked the Halls today...

They kept coming over singing those damn Christmas carols. Bah humbug!

Chess, the singing parrot

This guy goes into a pet shop looking for a bird. The shopkeeper brings him to a cage and tells him, “You won’t believe what this parrot Chess can do. He’s wonderfully talented, and his songs will blow your mind. Only $10,000.”

“That’s pretty steep,” he replies. “What’s so amazing about these...

Christmas Decoration

A couple of days before Christmas, a business man was anxious to get home from a business trip. The trip had been exhausting and he was not in a good mood. The airport loudspeakers blared Christmas carols he was sick of hearing. He thought their decorations were tacky. The worst decoration, he thoug...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Christmas Parrot

One Christmas Eve, a frenzied young man ran into a pet shop looking for an unusual Christmas gift for his wife. The shop owner suggested a parrot, named Chet, which could sing famous Christmas carols. This seemed like the perfect gift. "How do I get him to sing?" The young man asked, excitedly. "Sim...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Christmas chestnuts joke...

This one's kind of corny, but it's always been a good one for me that's safe with family.

A man walks into a pet shop to buy a parrot, and he's sees several beautiful varieties for sale. One of the parrots looks fairly bedraggled, and is not nearly as colorful as the rest, but it's price is ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The night before Christmas, a man steps into a pet store to buy his daughter a Christmas present.

An employee spots him walking around and asks if he can help.

"I want to buy my daughter a present for Christmas, but I have no idea what to get her. Do you have any pets that do tricks?"

"Follow me, " the employee says. They walk to one section with several birds, and stop in front of...

A man walks into a pet shop

He'd like to buy a pet for his lonely, widowed mother. The shop owner shows him all of the usual stuff,
hamsters, puppies, kittens, etc. and the man tells the owner that he's looking for something unique.

The owner takes him to the back of the shop and introduces him to raggedy looking par...

John gets a Christmas parrot

John decided to get his wife a Christmas present. Maybe a puppy. Walking in to the pet store, he searches for the right puppy.


"Excuse me sir, are you looking for a Christmas present?" the clerk asked. "Yes, I think she would like a puppy," John replies.


"Here," motioning towar...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favorite Christmas joke

A few days before Christmas, a man enters a pet store looking for a unique gift for his wife.

The store manager tells him he has just what he's looking for! A beautiful parrot named Chet that sings Christmas carols. He brings the husband over to a colorful but quiet bird.

The man agree...

What's Donald Trumps's favorite Christmas carol?

White Christmas

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.