UPJOKE
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What's the difference between an American and a phone charger

One's USA, while the other is USB

Why can’t American phone chargers walk straight?

Cause the USB trippin

Does anyone have a charger

We're dying

How many chargers does Mark Zuckerberg carry when he travels?

Three. One for his laptop, one for his phone and one for himself.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Take most Ford and most Dodge models...now put the word Anal in front of the model name

Anal charger, Anal challenger, Anal expedition, Anal Fiesta...

In the hospital, I asked the charge nurse for a phone charger - she was very offended.

Don't even get me started on the reaction from the head nurse.

My girlfriend thinks I stole her phone charger. She can only find the cord.

I told her I won’t stand for these baseless accusations.

Constable: I saw a guy driving a Charger, a Challenger, and a Viper in the same day

Sergeant: Hmm, seems a bit dodgy

Facebook: I know everything.

Google: I control everything.

Internet: Without me both of you are useless.


Charger: Shhhhhh keep quiet!!!

"Anyone got a charger?"

"Yeah, is a wall charger fine?"


"No, I meant for my phone."

I have Note 7...I have a charger....ugh...

Bomb has been planted.

What do Apple and the NFL have in common?

The Chargers suck.

My phone charger has been exposing its inner wires to promote its agenda.

It's a shameless plug.

A sports joke that can be changed to whatever your favorite sport rivalry is.

On the first day of school, a teacher tells her students that she is a Chargers fan.  She asks her students to raise their hands if they are a Chargers fan, too.  Everyone in the class raised their hand except one little girl.  The little girl said "I am a Raiders fan".

The teacher asked why ...

Do you know why there's no Apple wireless charger?

Because they can't decide what exactly should break there.

Just Bought the new Dodge Hornet EV and ended up with two cars

Dealer said I also needed a Dodge Charger

What is the most common question asked by iPhone users?

"Does anyone have a charger I could use?"

I asked my kids, "Why isn't an iPhone charger...?"

"...called Apple Juice?!"

What is a charger's favorite group ?

AC DC

For fathers day, I bought my dad a $100 gift card to the Apple Store...

He said "Thanks for the phone charger, son."

Homemade and 100% organic

Since it's my cake day, I'll give y'all a joke that I created by myself. One that tickles me.

Two car salesman were talking to each other about their sales. They were really impressed with the commissions they were making with electric cars. Then, one of them asked, "Why doesn't Dodge sel...

A couple roommates squabble over the only phone charger in the house. One punches the other square in the face. The cops show up.

He is charged with battery.

What do new IPhones have in common with San Diego?

No Chargers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Raider Hater

A little girl has her first day in a new school after moving from San Francisco to Los Angeles.

The teacher asks the class “How many of you are Charger fans?”

The whole class raises their hands except for the little girl.

Teacher asks “What is your favorite team?”

“The Ni...

I do not follow any order!

\+ Your cellphone battery is at 5%. Connect your charger.

\- Ok.

Some girl has stolen my phone and clicked naked selfies.My cloud is full of them now. Somebody help me find her

I need to give her a charger too.

TIL that the majority of car companies make cell phones,

Except for Dodge, they just make Chargers.

Some people wake up finding messages like “Good morning baby”

I wake up with “Battery full, Remove charger”

How do you milk sheep?

You release a new iPhone (and exclude the charger)

The hardware store was having a sale on batteries the other day.

If you bought a battery charger, they’d give you a battery, free of charge!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I talked to my schoolteacher friend the other day.

She’s a schoolteacher in San Diego.

On the first day of school, she asked all of her first graders how many of them were San Diego Charger fans.

Of course, all of her kids raised their hands, except this one girl.

She looked at the girl curiously and asked, “Why aren’t you a Ch...

Have you ever thought of an awesome joke but had to race the final 1% of your battery to post it?

Back when I had an Android I sure did but look at me now, my iPhone still has 27% lef........

There are those who check their cellphone battery life at the end of a work day to see how much they goofed off..

And then there are those with cellphone chargers.

With the iPhone 7 we have to charge the phone and the earphones, with the iphone 8 ...

... I think we'll also have to charge the charger.

What's the iPhone's favorite football team?

The Chargers.

The Golden State Warriors will be playing in an empty arena tonight, due to Coronavirus.

And the Los Angeles Chargers have already announced that, next season, they will continue to play in an empty stadium.

Ole and Sven go to Hell

Ole and Sven, ignoring the -60 degree windchill warnings, froze to death while ice fishing in northern Minnesota and descend to Hell.

Coming to check on his new arrivals from up North, Satan is surprised to find Ole and Sven enjoying themselves, finally removing coats and hats that they've ...

A geek dies and goes to heaven.

After spending a few days there, he realizes there are a lot of people he wants to talk to, and a lot of questions he wants to ask them. He walks up to an angel and asks, "So how come we don't have iPads up here? It would be really nice to have an iPad; that way I could jot down a note about somethi...

David and Shane worked for a small furniture company which had recently developed a new product.

They had been developing a new kind of smart shelf, and it was finally finished. This shelf had everything! Part of it featured a built in wireless charger, there were USB ports, part of it could flip up to reveal a screen which could be used as digital picture frame as well as had access to YouTube...

With the quarantine, California highway patrol's job suddenly got a lot more boring.

There was a trooper on the side of the 101 fighting to keep his eyes open, as there was empty road as far as he could see. Suddenly, he heard the roar of a charger zip past him. He flicked on his lights and siren and went after it. He clocked them going at 100MPH!

The car quickly pulled ov...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tiny Blue Dot

A rich kid is taking his newly acquired vintage Ferrari out for a spin. He starts putting the pedal down as he gets out into the rural areas, just having a blast. His fuel starts running a bit low so he pulls into an old gas station. An older fellow wearing faded jeans and a blue shirt with the g...

1008 AD - A tall knight is summoned by his lord...

On the way to the lord's castle, the knight, one Sir Richard of River's Bank is surprised to see that the fields are empty, and the serfs are nowhere in sight. When he arrives, he asks his lord if the summons has anything to do with the absence of the workers in the field, and his lord replies that...

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