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Body Part Jokes

What human body part is long, hard, bendable, and contains the letters p,e,n,i,s?

Your spine

When you die what body part dies last?

The pupils, they dilate

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The Most Important Body Part

One day the different parts of the body were having an
argument to see which should be in charge.

The brain said "I do all the thinking so I'm the most
important and I should be in charge."

The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you
know where we are, so I'm the m...

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Most important body part..

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who is in charge.

Brain said "I should be incharge because I run all the body's systems. So without me, nothing would happen"

Blood said "I should be incharge because I circulate oxygen all over the body. Without me y...

What body part makes the best student?

The eye, because it’s a good pupil!

NSFW A dog and a cat are having an argument about who is the favorite with humans. The dog says, “humans like us more; they even named a tooth after us (the canine). Naming an important body part after us proves they like dogs more.”

The cat smiles and says, “Guess what? You are not going to win this one”

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What’s the most loyal body part?

Dick.

During hard times, it stands up for you.

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A woman asks her friend what her most sensitive body part is during sex.

Her friend replied: My ears
Her: Oh really?
Her friend: Yes. Because I have to keep listening whether my husband gets home.

What body parts always lose?

Da' feet.

(I heard this one on the radio on the way to work)

Rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of an important human body part that is most useful when erect...

...Those who answered 'spine' will be doctors someday. The rest of us will be posting jokes on Reddit.

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The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”

No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”

Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to...

My friend started selling his own body parts to make money

First it was just one of his fingers to pay some bills off. When he realised how much he could make he sold even more body parts. Sitting in his mansion, rich enough to afford not to work, he asked me what I thought about him selling even more body parts.

I told him, I think you should quit w...

It’s weird that we count votes based on body parts...

Let me see all the eyes... now the nose...

Do you know anyone selling body parts?

I'd like to buy a bowel.

Different body parts rate each other

The Brain to the Liver: “You’re a 6.”

The Spleen to the Colon: “You’re a 7.”

The Urethra to the Bladder: “Urinate.”

What's the most washed body part of 2020?

The brain...

I sold all my body parts to feed my gambling addiction.

Maybe I should quit while I’m a head

Which body part continues to live even after a person dies?

The Liver

Annoyed at my constant reminders to stop eating her own body parts,

my wife threw up her hands in frustration.

I'm a fruit. If you take away my first letter, I'm a body part. If you take away my first and last letter, I suck. What am I?

pear

How does Dr. Frankenstein keep track of his body parts?

He uses an organ-izer.

What body part always loses in a game?

Defeat

What is a necrophiliac’s favorite body part?

Deadass

Street gangs of southern LA have started decapitating each other and using the body parts to trade for goods...

The most valuable of which is the Crip toe currency.

I had to fire some of my body parts this morning.

My bowels were relieved of their duties.

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Three men with tiny body parts meet up...

One has tiny hands, one has tiny feet, and one has a tiny penis. They all think theirs are the tiniest in the world. So they go to Guinness World Records to make it official.
The first guy walks in, and comes out with a plaque in his hand and a big smile on his face, and says, “I have the tinies...

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What is the average man's most sensitive body part when masturbating?

The ears, so he can hear if he's about to be caught.

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Body parts were arguing, about who should rule the organism.

I should rule! Said the brain. I tell you all how to work!

No! I should! Said heart. I pump blood, so you all can live and have nutrients!

Bullshit! Said kidneys. We filter toxic things out of the blood! Without us you all would get poisoned!

What? Said stomach. I digest the foo...

Did you hear about the road made of body parts?

They call it the Organ Trail

Name the body part that your mom has 2 and a cow has 4.

Legs.

Did you hear about the guy who had such a gambling problem, he sold every single body part to pay for it?

He should have quit while he was still a head.

Did you hear about the guy who won an award for having the most extra body parts?

He won the Chernobyl Piece Prize.

What's the slowest-moving body part in the entire animal kingdom?

Mole Asses.

I have a problem with people that are missing body parts.

I guess I might just be lack-toes-intolerant.

Which specific body part makes a ton of movie blockbusters?

This knee.

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There's a doctor who goes around my neighbourhood handing out body parts...

...he gives me the willies.

What’s a woman’s favorite body part?

I can’t remember what it’s called but it’s on the tip of my tongue.

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This man’s body parts having a meeting to decide how to survive the pandemic.

Brain has the chair.

He starts: Ok Everyone. Things looking bleak: a deadly virus is going around, the master is sitting home all day and not getting enough sun or exercise, he lost his job and started drinking – so The hard times are ahead. We need to get together and think how we can survi...

If you had to choose one body part to smell . . .

Would you pick your nose ?

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Parts of the body having a debate.

One day all the body parts are gathered together to discuss who amongst them should be the leader.

The brain steps forward and says "I should be the leader for i am the cleverest. I keep everyone organized and find solutions to problems."

Everyone is quite impressed until the heart st...

A serial killer who was known for taking body parts as trophies

A serial killer who was known for taking body parts as trophies was captured after attacking a uniformed police officer and severing her arm. When asked why he went after the officer despite knowing the danger, he simply replied, "It was a wrist I was willing to take."

I had no idea I wasn't allowed to remove body parts from the morgue until the mortician told me.

When he said it, I was takin' a back.

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One day, all the parts of the body were talking about who was most important.

THE BRAIN SAID – “Since I control everything and do all the thinking, I am the most important therefore I should be boss.”

THE FEET SAID – “Since I carry him everywhere he wants to go and get him in position to do what the brain wants, I am the most important.”

THE EYES SAID – “Since I...

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Two men walk into an Irish bar, one of them pushing a wheelbarrow full of body parts...

When the bartender sees this the bartender exclaims "Jesus Christ, Murphy, what in God's name is that?"

Murphy replies "Don't you recognize me old pal Smitty?"

"Well what the hell happened to him?"

Murphy sighs "Well me and Smitty and Mickey here we're walking down the street ...

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What's the second most talkative body part behind your ass

It's your mouth

Doctor: "What body part would you be okay with losing?"

Patient: "my spine, it's holding me back"

I used to go into shopping centres and rotate the body parts of the mannequins...

I don't think everyone noticed, but I certainly turned a few heads.

My wife keeps insisting that I tell her my favorite body part and vegetable

I told her eye yam but she doesnt listen

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Of all my body parts my dick has the most mood swings..

It is either up or down

What were the monster's first words after Dr. Franksenstein brought him back to life after sewing together different body parts?

Thanks for re-membering me.

Put these letters together to form a word. P N E I S Clue: a body part that is very important when erect.

The answer is spine.

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My Opinion on Body Part Puns?

They're pretty humerus if you ass me.

What is a Pot Heads favorite body part?

'ear *cough* 'ear

Out of all my body parts, my eyes are in the best shape...

I roll them at least 489 times a day.

What body part do adults have two of and children have four of?

Kidneys.

When I was young, I decided to go to medical school…

At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange the letters:

P N E I S

to form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered SPINE are doctors today, while the rest are on Facebook.

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