Bear in mind,

some pandas are telepathic.

Patient: I become terrified every time I think of large animals.

Doctor: We can control that with medication, but bear in mind--

Patient: AAAAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!

You know what's a scary thought?

Bear in mind...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Loving Wife

A couple years ago I met the love of my life. She's beautiful, intelligent, and compliments all of my weaknesses with her strengths. Recently, she became pregnant and I could not be more filled with joy. We found out we were having a boy, which was the perfect icing on the cake. Now there will be so...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN:

**NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN:**

Please be advised that anyone planning to dash through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are required to undergo a full Risk Assessment addressing the safety of open sleighs. This assessment must also consider wheth...

Rarely, hikers of the Appalachian trail report seeing psychic grizzlies take control of their friends, who start foraging and looking for honey...

Bear in mind, that doesn't happen very often.

How does one walk through a Siberian forest?

Do it in a calm and relaxed manner, but bear in mind

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