Hobbit: “What aviation school should we attend?”

Gandalf: “Fly U, fools.”

I hired a specialist aviation lawyer to deal with a dispute I had with an airport baggage handler.

He lost my case.

What's the worst school to drop out of?

Aviation school.

Aviation joke.... It's better to break ground and head into the wind.

Than to break wind and head into the ground.

What are three most useless things in aviation?

The runway behind you.

The altitude above you.

The fuel back at the fbo still in the fuel truck.

An aviation enthusiast enters a bar.

He asks, "Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?" The bartender laughs and says, "Sorry, we only have plain chips."

Rockets? Maybe. But the Chinese haven't contributed to aviation.

After all, two Wongs don't make a Wright.

So, have you guys heard of a chicken cannon?

Used by US Federal Aviation Administration, it's a unique device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. The device is a gun that launches a dead chicken at a plane’s windshield at approximately the speed the plane flies.



The theory is that if the windshield doesn’t crac...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the Japanese firefighter who changed careers to aviation in 1940?

He went from hero to Zero.

Did you hear the one about the American military aviation enthusiast who bought himself a French fighter plane?

He was arrested for possession of an Assault Rafale.

Ireland has suffered its worst aviation disaster in history after a 2 seat Cessna crashed in a graveyard this evening...

Irish Search and Rescue say they have recovered 835 bodies so far and expect to find far more as digging continues throughout the night.

What does CNN call back-to-back aviation disasters?

Christmas in July

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke about black aviation.

So my cousin is in aviation school. He decided to learn how to fly so he can propose to his fiance. Anyway almost all of the other students in his class are black people. Nothing wrong with that, it was just weird because it's in an area with very few african americans. So it's weird to see that man...

The Admiral with only one ear..

Years ago, a young Navy Pilot was injured while ejecting from his A-4 Skyhawk due to engine failure during a cat shot from the carrier, but due to the heroics of rescue helicopter crew and the ship's hospital staff, the only permanent injury was the loss of one ear.
 
Since he wasn't physicall...

What do you call...

What do you call a forum page about Swedish military aviation?

A saabreddit

My Daughter…

My daughter once said to me

“Dad, according to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.”

She was...

A Chinese couple emegrated to America...

When Mr. & Mrs. Wong had twin boys they wanted to name them after two great Americans and since Mr. Wong had always been fascinated with aviation he decided to name them Oreville and Wilbur Wright. When told them that they couldn't give them a surname other than their own, they took the case to ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Reaction to Snakes

• Civilian: Runs away from the snake screaming.

• Paratrooper: Lands on and kills the snake.

• Armor: runs over snake, giggles, and looks for
more snakes.

• Infantry: "Look, a putty cat. Come 'ere
kitty....Ouch! Hey, that's not a putty tat."

• Army Aviation: Has GPS...

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