At First Jokes - 40 Hilarious At First Jokes

I just accidentally superglued my thumb and index finger together and at first, I started to panic but then I remembered that...

...it’s always going to be okay!

At first, my girlfriend didn't want to get a brain transplant

then I changed her mind

At first there were only 25 letters in the alphabet.

Nobody knew why.

If at first you don't succeed...

...skydiving is not for you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy gets put in a nursing home by his son. He doesn’t know if he’s going to like it at first, but he decides to give it a shot for his son’s sake.

The first morning in the nursing home he wakes up with a hard on. Out of nowhere a beautiful nurse's aide walks in, bends over & blows him without saying a word.
The guy gets on the phone with his son and says, "Son, I love this place! Thank you so much for putting me in this nursing home....

My motto is, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

Anyway, I don't give skydiving lessons anymore.

At first Maximus Decimus Meridius felt remorse for consuming his wife.

But in the end. He was gladiator.

If at first you don’t succeed.

Suck harder.

At first I was confused when my boss told me to go get the Geiger counter…

…but then it clicked.

At first, I thought Chiropractors are a scam ...

but now, I stand corrected.

My girlfriend asked me to stop singing I'm a believer by The Monkees, because she found it annoying. At first I thought she was kidding.

But then I saw her face.

I did not like my haircut at first.

But then it grew on me.

I used to make jokes at work during meetings and could really get people laughing, then COVID hit and everything went online. I’d still make jokes, but no one would laugh. Not one. At first, I thought it was just because everyone was muted, but it turns out...

They didn’t find me remotely funny...

I believe in love at first sight....

.....but science calls it an erection.

At first I didn’t understand how to use my mind-controlled air freshener

But after thinking about it for a while, it finally made scents.

Marriage is like a deck of cards. At first it's all hearts and diamonds

Then you are in your garage looking for a club and a spade.

If at first you don't succeed...

Mutate into the next letter of the Greek alphabet and try again.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At first dates, every woman I ask says they're a "glass half full person...

But when I tell them I was talking about my dick, suddenly 3 inches means their glasses are all half empty

If at first you don't succed...

Maybe skydiving wasn't the best of ideas

If at first you don't succeed

perhaps Russian roulette isn't for you

At first, I wasn't embarrassed about the way I broke my arm

But I heard the doctors calling it a "humerus fracture"

My wife wasn't sure about getting a pet werewolf at first

But she's since taken a real lycan to him.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

First day at medical school..

It was the first day at medical school and all the students gathered around a corpse in a lab next to the professor.

The professor says, "There are two important lessons every person wanting to be a doctor should learn. The first lesson is that you should never feel disgusted about the human ...

You know cancer sucks at first...

But it grows on you over time.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Love at first sight

A guy and woman were sitting in a bar, their eyes met from across the room and it was love at first sight. They stood up together and approached each other. After a few drinks the man said "I know this is crazy but lets get married". The woman responded with "It is crazy but i was thinking the exact...

If at first you succeed

You probably did something wrong go back and figure out what it was.

At first I didn’t know an angry mob was outside my home because I only heard a polite knock on my door.

But when I discovered the truth of my predicament, I stayed as quiet as a mouse—quieter, even—and fortunately, after a short time, they all got bored and left.

Power to the peephole.

Foot fetishists are great at first impressions.

They always get off on the right foot.

If Russia and Germany would invade Poland again, who the Poles will shoot at first?

Germans. Business before pleasure.

At first, I really hated the large pimple on my nose.

But it’s grown on me.

At first I didn't really care for this toenail fungus...

...but it's really starting to grow on me!

At first I didn’t like my mustache, because it made me look like a total dad.

But it’s growing on me.

I decided to try writing some erotica. At first it was really easy.

And then it got hard.

At first I thought my therapy for Stockholm syndrome was useless

But now I kind of like it.

At first I thought I was only attracted to dad bods...

But then I realized I just wanted a father figure.

I didn't like my girlfriend at first.

I didn't like my girlfriend at first.

Until she told me she was a conservative, then I knew everything would be all right.

^(\*This is not meant to be political, it is just a joke.)

At first my wife was angry that I bought a hot-tub without asking her

But she's slowly warming up to it

At first I thought it weird that Joe Biden wanted to make his press secretary staff all women

But then I remembered that meant he didn't need to pay them as much

My friend told me to visit the chiropractor and I was sceptical at first...

...but now I stand corrected.

I just dyed my hair, and I wasn't too fond of it at first...

But its growing on me

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