If at first you don't succed...

Maybe skydiving wasn't the best of ideas

Having a tumor isn’t that great at first…

…but it grows on you.

At first, I hated my genital warts

But now they're really growing on me.

At first I didn’t like my beard but after a few months

it’s really growing on me.

I didn't like my new haircut at first

But it's grown on me

At first my wife was angry that I bought a hot-tub without asking her

But she's slowly warming up to it

An Egyptian pharaoh hired me to lay flooring at a tomb he was building. He said it wouldn’t pay well at first but as I worked my way to the top I would reap the benefits. it wasn’t quite a pyramid scheme

But it was multi level carpeting.

I decided to try writing some erotica. At first it was really easy.

And then it got hard.

What is toxic at first, but makes life a lot more fun when everyone is used to it?

Oxygen

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At first, I wasn't sure if my wife and I would be sexually compatible, but she assured me she knew what I would like. She was right...

...she had me pegged from the start.

You know cancer sucks at first...

But it grows on you over time.

At first I thought it weird that Joe Biden wanted to make his press secretary staff all women

But then I remembered that meant he didn't need to pay them as much

I've never had my hair so long in my life. At first I hated it.

I'm not sure why but it's growing on me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

COVID-19 is like a check engine light, at first you're like, "fuck, this is terrifying"

But after a while you'll be like, "fuck, I need to get to work!"

At first, I really hated the large pimple on my nose.

But it’s grown on me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At first I was mad when my doctor prescribed me medication that would lower my sex drive, but now ..

No hard feelings.

If at first you don't succeed

perhaps Russian roulette isn't for you

At first I wasn’t quite sure if my dog was pregnant, bloated, or just fat

But then it became apparent

At first I didn't really care for this toenail fungus...

...but it's really starting to grow on me!

Foot fetishists are great at first impressions.

They always get off on the right foot.

If at first you don't succeed

Then suck another seed.

Did you hear about Russel Crow's recent problem with cannibalism? At first he expressed shame about consuming a mother of two.

But upon further consideration he was gladiator.

At first I thought I was only attracted to dad bods...

But then I realized I just wanted a father figure.

I was doing a lab on nuclear decay and at first it worked like expected, but when 3/4 of the material had decayed it suddenly stopped

It seems like there will never be a half life 3

My neighbor likes to make a big deal about how SOME people prefer listening to rock music that's made using only a guitars, drums, and vocals. At first I thought he was just an opinionated music listener but...

I'm starting to think he's a bassist.

At first I wanted to break up with my girlfriend because she didn’t like to play video games...

It wasn’t really something to Fallout 4.

At first, my girlfriend didn't want to get a brain transplant

then I changed her mind

If at first you succeed

You probably did something wrong go back and figure out what it was.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Love at first sight

A guy and woman were sitting in a bar, their eyes met from across the room and it was love at first sight. They stood up together and approached each other. After a few drinks the man said "I know this is crazy but lets get married". The woman responded with "It is crazy but i was thinking the exact...

I've been a beekeeper for years and when my crush said "It's me or it's those nasty insects, make up your mind", at first I didn't think she was serious.

Then I saw her face.

Now I'm a bee-leaver.

I just accidentally superglued my thumb and index finger together and at first, I started to panic. But then I remembered...

That it’s always going to be okay...

My girlfriend asked me to stop singing I'm a believer by The Monkees, because she found it annoying. At first I thought she was kidding.

But then I saw her face.

I saw all the people complaining about inappropriate YouTube ads, and at first I thought they were kidding. Then I saw a Trojan condoms ad.

I thought they were horsing around.

At first I did not like my quarantine hair...

...but then it grew on me.

My friend told me to visit the chiropractor and I was sceptical at first...

...but now I stand corrected.

At first I thought my therapy for Stockholm syndrome was useless

But now I kind of like it.

At first, I didn't realize that I had been sold a dull razor.

But then it grew on me.

Medical advances these days are absolutely crazy. They've found ways to activate taste buds in people who were born without the sense. Surprisingly most people don't like it at first.

Its an acquired taste.

I bought a candle and at first I was confused because it didn’t smell like anything...

but eventually it made scents.

I didn't really like my conjoined twin brother at first

But then he grew on me

I told my friend "If at first you don't succeed, try and try again."

Well, turns out he's addicted to gambling now.

What feels fragile at first but starts to feel more durable the longer you have it?

Your phone

Smoking a cigarette in a crowded room, I was a little bit worried at first when someone screamed at me, "Did you know second hand smoke is worse than smoking!?!"

But after a little thought I realized I had made the right decision.

Marriage is like a deck of cards. At first it's all hearts and diamonds

Then you are in your garage looking for a club and a spade.

At first the doctor didn't recognize the farm boy that had been in the threshing accident...

...but then he re-membered him.

Yesterday my crush told me that “I was like a brother to her” I was sad at first then I remember

She was from Alabama

I used to be a beekeeper, but my wife demanded that I either leave her or the bees because she had so many stings. At first, I thought this couldn't be true.

Then I saw her face, ...

My motto is "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."

They don't let me volunteer for the suicide prevention hotline anymore.

If at first you don't succeed,

The bomb squad is not the job for you

At first, I thought my idea for a social media platform had failed

But then I made a 4chan.

At first the French were chill about the revolutionists

…but they lost their heads when they started the executions

I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It was pretty bad at first,

But by the end I kinda liked it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At first, Caesar thought it was a bad idea to masturbate while counting his people.

But before long, he came to his census.

When I joined the Botswana Men's Choir, at first I was shy around everyone

But then we all just clicked.

At first the Roman warrior felt remorse for devouring his wife, but in the end...

He was Gladiator.

What’s hard and dry at first but once out in a mouth turns soft, wet and sticky?

Gum

I didn't like my girlfriend at first.

I didn't like my girlfriend at first.



Until she told me she was a conservative, then I knew everything would be all right.



^(\*This is not meant to be political, it is just a joke.)

What is green at first and than turns red?

A frog in a blender.

My mate is in a band called NS. At first, I was fascinated to find out what it stands for. But now I'm not too bothered.

It's nothing special.

At first when you came in and ordered glass underwear I though it was a new style...

But now I can see your nuts

A Korean boy, who is the head chef of a local soup restaurant, is arrested for accusingly spitting in every bowl of soup that’s made and poisoning all of the customers. The other chefs knew about it and didn’t say anything at first, but eventually couldn’t hide it any longer and told the cops.

He is punished to serious, hard work for a month, but he is always upbeat no matter what. So one day the cops decide to see if any one of them can make the boy unhappy. One decides to put the boy’s shoes in a block of cement. The boy doesn’t care, and he just does his work with no shoes. Another dec...

At first it was difficult to remember how to throw a boomerang.

Then it started to come back to me.

At first I was depressed when they put me in prison for life behind a metre-high wall

But I soon got over it

The daughter of a melon farmer and a travelling musician met one day and fell in love at first sight

The woman’s name was Angie, a beautiful, red-haired woman with a smile so magnetic and radiant one couldn’t help but fall head-over-heels; the musician’s name was Zachary, a strapping, young lad with flowing, blonde hair and broad shoulders, just wide enough to give him a powerful physique yet not i...

At first I was worried about my narcolepsy

But I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

At first, I wasn't too happy the way my barber cut my hair, but honestly..

It's starting to grow on me

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend told me his dick was like a Magikarp. Small at first then grows to be enormous.

I told him that mine was like a Magikarp too. Starts small, then people get frustrated because it’s a worthless piece of shit that only knows how to splash.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jerking off with glue was fun at first...

But now it just feels like I’m beating a dead horse.

At first I thought my son was break dancing, so I started beat boxing around him.

Turns out he's epileptic.

Got a haircut last week. Didn’t love it at first...

But it’s grown on me.

At first, I wasn’t sure I liked my hair after getting it cut...

...But I think it’ll grow on me.

At first, I was skeptical about replacing my florescent bulbs with newer LED ones...

But once I did, I started seeing things in new light.

I got really badly sunburned yesterday, and was in agony this morning. My mother advised using tomato juice to ease the pain. I was very skeptical at first but she was right...

... I'm now on my seventh bloody mary and I can barely feel a thing.

Today I made this one without knowing it at first...

I always keep forgetting unimportant things and my friend asked me: "Does someone in your family have alzheimer?"

Me: "Not that I would know..."

My friends starts laughing, I realize why and join in.

I lost a loved one recently and while I was sad at first, I'm okay with it now...

The wiki says they get brought back next season.

If at first you don’t like tea

Chai, chai, chai again

Hey, you funny fellows, what are some nonchalant jokes to tell people that do not sound like a joke at first?

I need to impress my friends with Internet stuff, gosh.

At first I suspected foul play in the whole Aaron Hernandez suicide thing.

But I think he was just a guy at the end of his rope.

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