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Articulate Jokes

Mercedes makes articulated buses.

You could call them Mercedes Bends.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Admiral

An Admiral, whom lost one of his ears in an accident and was very
sensitive about his appearance, was interviewing a Navy Master Chiefs,
an Aviation Master Chief and a Marine Sergeant Major for his personal
staff...


The first Master Chief was a Surface Navy type and it w...

Microsoft should try making an optimistic and articulate robot that adjusts its responses based on interactions with the public.

They could call it Marco Rubio.

The first rule of Thesaurus Club is

that you do not talk, whisper, chatter, mumble, rant, articulate, prattle, babble, describe, divulge, drone, confer, deliberate, squeal, converse, discourse, orate or speak about Thesaurus Club.

A German shepherd walks into a bar

and says “Hey, I’m a talking dog. Other dogs can do tricks, but have you ever heard one talk? How about a drink for a dog who’s articulate and erudite?"


The bartender says, “Sure, the toilet’s there, first door on the right.”

What's one nice thing Republicans say about Obama that they'll never say about Trump?

He's articulate.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Good Etiquette

During a good manners and etiquette class being taught at the local high school for senior boys, the young, attractive, first-year teacher asked, "If you were courting a well-educated girl from a prominent family and during dinner, you needed to use the bathroom, how would you properly excuse yourse...

Two guys are driving together late at night...

They notice a stake in the ground on the side of the road with the letters “RE” on it. “Hmmm” they wonder, “what’s that about?”

They continue on, and they notice another. Then one more.

At this point, the passenger merely sighs out of boredom, and then passes out, exhausted.

Mea...

Sherlock Holmes and Watson go Camping

They spend the day tracking small animals, fishing, and having a grand time by the shores of a remote lake, before cooking up their dinner and settling into their beds and drifting off to sleep.

Sometime after midnight, Holmes wakes up feeling insightful.
He wakes Watson up.

"Watson...

I had Kevin Spacey show up at a house party

I don’t see what all the fuss about him is. I was chatting to him for an hour about all things from art and music to politics.

He’s a very articulate and intelligent man but I must say his sense of direction is a bit off.

He cut our conversation short saying that he had to use the li...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A doctor, an architect, and an attorney were dining together at the country club.

The conversation turned to the subject of their respective dogs, which were apparently quite extraordinary, and a wager was placed on who had the most intelligent dog.

The doctor offered to show his dog first, and called to the parking lot, "Hippocrates, come!" Hippocrates ran in, and was to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar and opens his suitcase revealing a million dollars in cash.

"I'll give this million dollars to the first person who can sing "Auld Lang Syne" and give me head at the same time."

Immediately people started a stampede, men, women and children all alike, towards the mans crotch. They whipped his dick out and started battling over who gets to do the "perf...

I hope to work at an umbrella factory.

Ever since being a child, I have appreciated the unique motions of the umbrella. Unparalleled in all of man's creation, and unrivaled in nature, the conic beauty of the umbrella has become iconic in my heart.


I have wanted to work at an umbrella factory for years because of my deep rooted...

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