UPJOKE
distancewidthmilelongdurationmeterwidevolumecubittransfer pricinglengthfarnessdistantfarfaraway

Arm's Length Jokes

Studies say most stabbings are committed by someone close to the victim.

Within arm's length, to be specific.

arm's length

what do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
a speech impediment

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A demon is checking a new arrival into Hell.

"Says here," he says, "you didn't really do anything wrong and they were willing to let you into the Other Place."

"Yes," said the dead soul. "But I said I'd rather be in Hell with my best friend than in Heaven with God!"

"Huh," says the demon. "Okay, we don't normally do requests, but...

My roommate complained about me peeing in the shower, but to my way of thinking it's just a sensible way to save water.

Also, it's not like I'm going to miss from less than arm's length away.

And even if I do splash on her feet, it rinses right off at once.

I don't like my hands

I always keep them at arm's length

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Watchmaker

The Boy was due to meet his friends down the third alley from the green sign. The bar at the end of that alley, they had said, was a place where spirits and souls mixed together with the languid flow of warm summer air.

But The Boy had started drinking when the sun was still ascending, and n...

Three young friends, seeking a fortune, adventure together to Egypt where a new pyramid has been discovered.

Upon arriving at the pyramid, they are immediately told to leave as the site has already been excavated. The friends, not willing to concede, look for a different way in and find an entrance never before used.

It is through this entrance that they find a secret passageway, one that is made at...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.