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Aries Jokes

A man walks into a pet shop ...

A man walks into a pet shop to buy a parrot.

He asks the owner: "How much is the green one here?"

The owner says: "$1.000."

Customer: "That's a lot, why so much?"

Shop owner: "He can sing two arias from Mozart operas."

Customer: "How much is the red one over there?...

Hey girl, I'm an Aries...

Wanna get rammed?

Like most people born under the sign of Aries...

.. I don't believe in astrology.

Doctor Joke Number 1

Doctor what did you say i had? Aries or Pisces?

Cancer sir, you have Cancer.

Met a girl that's into horoscopes

Her : I'm a Sagittarius, bet that already tells you a lot about me.

Me : So according to this website, would you say you're a curious, energetic person that wants to be a part of things rather than be a spectator?

Her : Mmmhm that's me to a T

Me : Congratulations you're an Arie...

I beat Cancer today!

It's okay though I told her I was an Aries.

I hate people who defend their laziness with their zodiac sign!

I mean, I invited my friend into an important friend reunion but she didnt go!

I asked her what was wrong she said' "Oh, I have cancer"

Yeah im an Aries! So what?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Job Application for McDonalds

NAME: Kicky Pie   

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a yea...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Her

Her: what's my sign again?

Me: *struggling to remember* what's the part of newspapers where they talk about dead people?

Her: obituaries?

Me: OH BITCH U ARIES

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