UPJOKE
constellationspicaaquariuszodiacastrologystar signsagittariuspleiadescamelopardaliscygnusantaresvelaandromedabetelgeusefornax

Two men are roommates in a hospital. Because they are both weak from sickness, the men are unable to speak for weeks.

Finally, one man says to the other, “American.”



His roommate replies, “Canadian.”



Another week goes by and the first man says weakly, “Danny.”



The roommate can only reply, “Phil.”



Another week passes and the first man mutters to his roommat...
upvote downvote report

Twelve signs that you're an idiot:

1. Aries,
2. Taurus,
3. Gemini,
4. Cancer,
5. Leo,
6. Virgo,
7. Libra,
8. Scorpio,
9. Sagittarius,
10. Capricorn,
11. Aquarius, and
12. Pisces
upvote downvote report

If you were born in mid September, you're not a Virgo...

You're a Christmas present!
upvote downvote report

If you think about it, getting killed by the Zodiac Killer must suck…

Because imagine living your entire life up to that point just to be killed for being a Virgo.
upvote downvote report

On my first date, she asked me what am I doing currently

Me : I am right now in the process of eliminating all cancers

Her : Wow thats great!

Me : yep, after cancer it will be virgo
upvote downvote report

A guy walks into an eletronics store

Employee: *Hello Sir, how may I be of assistance*

Guy: *My dishwasher just died on me, I was wondering if I could get a similar one*

Employee: *Sure thing Sir, what was the make and model?*

Guy: *Fat, Brown Hair, Brown Eyed Virgo with an annoying mother*
upvote downvote report

First Date...

Her: So what do you do?

Me: I'm currently trying to eliminate all cancers

Her: Wow, impressive

Me: Then I'll move on to Virgos
upvote downvote report

I plan to eliminate all Cancers

Then I’ll move on to Virgos
upvote downvote report

I think horoscopes are absolute tosh.

But you know me, typical Virgo.
upvote downvote report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.

Do Not Sell My Personal Information