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April Fool Jokes

April Fools!

girl: babe I'm pregnant you're the father

guy: can't fool me it's April's Fools Day!

girl: haha! got me! you're not the father

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My best April Fools

A long time ago, before work, I drove through the shittiest neighborhood I could find, looking for broken auto glass. I found a pile from some unfortunate soul that had their car broken into and scooped it all up.

After settling in at work, I asked to borrow my boss's keys for access to the s...

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April fools day is cancelled

as no made up prank could match the unbelievable shit going on right now

Don't forget that today is April Fools!

**APRIL FOOLS**!

Am I doing this right?

I got a picture of my girlfriend sleeping with another man, followed an hour later by a message saying "April Fools!"

I should stop falling for that, it's the fourth time this month.

April Fools Day............

The day every newspaper tries to fool readers by sneaking in at least one properly researched, factually correct story.

Tee Pee a House on, April Fool's, 2020

Wouldn’t today, April Fool’s Day, 2020, be the best time to TeePee someone’s house?

The neighborhood will clean it up in four minutes.

We're sorry to announce that April fools has been postponed.

Due to the recent coronavirus crisis, April fools has been postponed to May 1st, 2020.
Thanks for your cooperation.

For April fools my girlfriend replaced my alphabits with Cheerios.

I have no words to say how angry I am.

Doctors have the most fun on April Fools.

Doctor: "i'm sorry to say you've got lung cancer."


Patient: [tearing up] "oh god, no!"

Doctor: "Sorry to say it because it's not true, lol April Fools!"

Patient: [angry] "What the hell?"

Doctor: "Yeah, pranked you, the cancer's in your pancreas."

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A little girl runs up to her mother and says "mummy, daddy hanged himself in the basement!"

Upon hearing the news the mother breaks down in tears and, shakily, makes her way into the basement.

When they get there, the woman cannot see the father's corpse.
The little girl then exclaims "April fools! Daddy did it in the garage"

What did they say to the first guy to pull off an April fools day prank?

Jesus! I thought you were dead!

I played an April Fool's joke on my parkour team this morning.

They all fell for it.

My colleagues took April Fools Day pretty seriously this year

Over a month and a half of going into the office and they're all still hiding from me

A man visits a wise man and meets his three daughters...

He's staying for the night and each of the girls come to him in turn to offer their hospitality.

The first one tells him her name is June because she was born in June. She is well practiced in fortune telling and gives him advice on the future.

The second one tells him her name is Augu...

Which monster loves April Fools jokes

Pranken-stein!

April Fool’s Day has been POSTPONED.

I’ll tell you the new date tomorrow.

Today is NOT my cake day

But when it comes I will NOT attempt to farm karma with it.


April fools.

The last time Easter fell on April Fool’s Day...

...Jesus tricked everybody by making them think he was dead for two days.

What was the worst april fools day joke?

Well logan paul was born in 1995.

April Fool's day has been cancelled due to coronavirus.

Everything you'll hear is true.

What's the worst part about April Fools?

Jokes without punchlines

I have an April fools joke going on with my landlord

I am not paying rent this April 1st hehe, don't tell him

CNN Made a Joke Article for April Fools

Just another day in the office.

Why Do News Channels love April Fools Day?

Because it's socially acceptable to do what they already do every day of the year.

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Billy's mom comes home. "Billy, what's wrong?" -"Dad hanged himself in the attic!" he said in tears.

The mother rushes to the attic in a panic, quickly followed by her son.
As she gets up to the attic, she notices that nothing is there, and little Billy started giggling.
HaHaHa! April fool's mommy!!! He hanged himself in the basement!"

Today is April Fools day so question everything and trust no one.

Basically...it's reddit day.

I just thought of the ultimate April Fool's Prank. Let me spell it out for you.

I T O U T F O R Y O U

April fools in Latvia

Latvian ask friend if he want potato for lunch. Friend guess is April Fool joke. Say "Too easy, never potato in Latvia, only sadness." One man starve to death during lunch.

April fools day on a news channel

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.

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An elderly woman winds up in court for murder...

Defence barrister: 'Will you please state your full name.'

Agatha: 'Agatha Louise Hewson.'

Defence barrister: 'Will you please state your age'

Agatha: 'I am 94 years old.'

Defence barrister: 'Will you tell us in your own words what happened on the night in question.'
<...

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel?

Dismay.

In honor of the eve of April Fools Day... just remember that tomorrow you need to be cautious of many tweets and news reports because most of them will be lies and simply there to try and trick you. Believe nothing, and trust no one.

Just treat it like it's any other day.



Have fun!

Easter this year is April Fools Day

Just remember that so you don't fall for any crazy stories like people coming back from the dead.

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April Fool's!

A woman goés into labor éarly and is rushéd to thé hospital. Aftér an agonizing night, shé finally givés birth, and thé doctor doés thé littlé pat on thé baby liké hé normally doés to stimulaté air flow. Thén hé tossés thé baby in thé air liké a pizza, and grabs it by thé légs and slams it into thé ...

I think the Stimulus Package is a sick April Fools joke.

It’s a Stimu-LIE!!!

Forgot it's April fool's!

What's the simplest way to really quickly get some friends so I can prank them?

This April fools, I decided to swipe right on only the ugly people on Tinder and then burn them.

Still no matches.

I finally fixed my time machine!

April Fool's! It's still broken.

My mom told me she hated me today

She forgot to say April Fools

A woman has just given birth to her child.

The doctor holds the newborn child at both feet, upside down, then slams it three times on the wall. The mother is shocked! The doctor consoles: «April fools! Was already dead!»

I finally switched from Internet Explorer to Chrome!

Just kidding, happy April fools day!

Timmy's April Fool's joke

The day is April 1st, and Timmy wanted to play an April Fool's joke on his mom.
His mom comes home from work, and Timmy rushes to her.

"Mommy! Mommy!" He says, frantically.

"What is it, Timmy?" She asks.

"Dad hanged himself in the garage!"

The mom screams, then rushes...

I just ran over my dog.

April fools! I don't know whose dog it was.

I love my life. Everybody around me is so happy. I am happy with myself and proud of my accomplishments. I would never think to harm myself in any way shape or form. And my heart is filled with nothing but positivity to myself and everyone around me.

APRIL FOOLS!!!!

Did you know the first Easter and ther first April Fools Day coincided as well?

The founder of both was a real trickster... He faked his own death!

(I feel like I should put a note here: this is not to mock religion... It's just a joke. If this offends you please get a sense of humor.)

Girlfriend said "I think I'm pregnant, I'm two weeks late..

..April fools!"

The best time to propose is on April 1st...

If they say no you can yell April fools!

Results

When my dad got my school results, he laughed harder than ever before, until he realised it was no longer april fools.

April Showers bring May Flowers

But did you know that March Tools bring April Fools?

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What is the difference between my wife and my vacuum?

The vacuum doesn't snore after sex.



April fools, I don't have a wife.

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Mum, father hanged himself!

A little boy runs to his mum crying: "Mum, Mum", he screams, "Father hanged himself!"
"Where is he hanging?", his mum asks.
"In the attic!", the boy says.
So the mum and her son go to the attic but nobody's there.
"But he isn't there", says the mum in relief.
Then her son says: "April...

In the spirit of Easter, I've hidden eggs around the appartment.

In the spirit of April Fools, I'm not telling my roommates.

Why is World Autism Day after April Fools’ Day?

Because it takes longer for them to get the joke.

Little Jonny was 5 years old and born blind

Little Jonny was 5 years old and born blind. One evening as his mother puts him to bed she says to him, "Jonny, tomorrow is a very special day: if you pray extra hard tonight God will grant you the miracle of sight". Super excited, Jonny jumps back out of bed, clasps his hands together and begin to ...

Parents should wake their kids up early tomorrow and tell them to get ready for school because coronavirus was canceled

April Fool's

James Bond is going to be played by a woman

As a woman, James Bond's name will be Fools, April Fools.

Surviving an attempted murder on April 1st.

Is just gods way of saying "April Fools"

Today is the day many people will confess to their crushes

And say it was an April fool's joke when they get rejected

"Sir, I'm gonna' let you off with a warning..."

"THANK YOU SO MUCH OFFIC----"

"April Fools....sign here."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm gay.

My parents knew, but I had April fooled.

I think my calendar is broken...

Haha, April Fools!
It works just fine.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

MOM! Dad hung himself in the attic.

April fools! He hung himself in the basement.

A lady goes into labour and is rushed to the hospital

She is in labour for hours and the birth is excruciating but eventually the baby comes out. The doctor taps the baby's bottom to get it to cry but nothing happens. The doctor then uses a little more force and smacks the baby's bottom harder but still nothing. The mother is getting extremely worried....

There was this little 9 year old blind kid, and one day he said to his mom, "Mom, All I've ever wanted was to see."

His mom said, "Well son it's your lucky day, today is the last day of March, and if you pray your hardest,your prayers will be answered."

So the little boy goes to bed 2 hours early and starts praying himself to sleep.

He wakes up half way through the night and realises that the night...

Today my wife told me she's pregnant because of the mailman

"Really?" I asked her.



"No, April Fools!" she replied, "I got an abortion".

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My Dad being an asshole to an 8 year old

Best April Fools Day joke; i was like 7 or 8, my dad and I are talking trash all of March 31st about who is gonna prank who better. Morning of april 1st my dad wakes me up and rushes me into the shower, has me change my clothes, and eat breakfast. As I'm about to head out to the bus stop I noticed i...

Trump is President of the United States and Britain left the EU.

APRIL FOOLS'!

Ah...wait...

Mommy mommy! Daddy hanged himself in the living room!

*mom rushes to the living room*

Kid: Haha! April fools! He did it in the attic!

A woman successful gives birth to a baby after several hours of labour. The doctor takes the baby and leaves to perform some tests. Several minutes later, the doctor returns with the baby in his arms and then suddenly behind to punch it, kick it, throw it about the room and slam it against the wall.

The woman screams, "OH MY God! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY Baby!?" To which the doctor replies, " April fools! It was already dead!"

[OC] I am pretty good at keeping up with which date it is

April Fools!

"mom, dad, I have something important to tell you: I'm straight"

Parents: "You do realize we just assume you're straight until you tell us otherwise, yes?"

Child: "HA! Got you! April fools!"

Girlfriend to boyfriend

GF - I'm sorry babe but i've cheated on you.

BF - I'm sorry aswell, I have also cheated on you.

GF - April fools day!

BF - Mine was on 24th March

Malcolm Turnbull plans to fix NBN over the next 5 years

Starting on April Fools Day

A woman is giving birth to her child

And finally, after much effort and pain, the doctor manages to help deliver the baby. The Doctor then proceeds to chuck the baby out of the window.

W: "Why? Why did you do that to my poor baby, you monster?"

The Doctor laughs maniacally and replies "April Fool's! He was already dead."

Oh my good and fellow Christians! It has been foretold our Lord and savior will once again rise from the dead and bless us all this Easter!

April Fools!

The Darkest Joke I Know

A boy is blind from the day he is born, Never knowing his mothers face never knowing colors and never knowing anything except what he can feel, smell, hear, or touch.

One night the boy is in his bedroom when his mother comes in and sits down on the bed beside him, she says "Sweetie I have som...

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