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Apple Orchard Jokes

Apple/orchard jokes needed!

I work at an apple orchard as an orchardist. I also tent to narrate the hay rides a lot. I've tried to Google apple jokes but could only find two decent ones.

What is darth vaders favorite apple? Empire apples

Why did the chicken cross the orchard? To get to the other cider

Tho...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the prostitute get angry after having sex in an apple orchard?

Because her client came in cider.

Did you hear about the guy who tried to grow an apple orchard without trees?

His efforts were fruitless

A walk through an apple orchard.

A man is walking through an apple orchard when he spots a farmer and some pigs by an apple tree.

He notices the farmer pick up a pig and hold it mid-air until the pig had finished an entire apple, then set the pig back down on the ground.

The man watches the farmer repeat this a few ...

I went to an apple orchard today. I had a lot of fun but I kind of embarrassed myself in front of the attractive tour guide.

Yeah, I slipped in cider.

The Apple Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree

Son: "Dad where did I come from?"

Dad: "One day your mother and I were walking through an apple orchard..."

Son *rolls eyes*: "And you grabbed an apple not far from a tr..."


Dad: "I slipped in cider."

Where's the best place to hide from a doctor?

An apple orchard.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] where's the best place to have sex?

In an Apple orchard, you always get to cum in cider.

Thorbeaux and Dreaux

I heard this somewhere else but really wanted to share

Thor and Dreaux were out one day under the hot summer sun digging a Ditch around an apple orchard, for their boss John. After a few hours of making the ditch, deaux turns to Thor and asks :
"Hey Thor, why are we here diggin a ditch and...

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