I got stopped by a woman cop with "LAPD" on her cap
I said, where's your colleague with "ANCE" on hers?
What do you call an annoying rope?
A noose-ance
I need an ambulance
911 Operator: 911 what's your emergency?
Drunk southern man: A man's been shot. I need an am-bu-ance.
911 Operator: Where are you at?
Man: I'm on Sycamore Street.
Operator: Sir you're going to have to spell that.
Man: Si... No, Sy... Tell you what, I'll drag him ov...
You know what the worst thing about execution by hanging is?
It’s such a noose-ance.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Warning: no pun alert, I repeat: not a pun
A man from Serbia was working in Germany for about ten years now and he was getting nostalgic for his home country so he went to the boss and said to him: " Boss, I have been woking hard all of these years and I would like to have a 2 week vacation to return to Serbia". Boss approved his wish so he ...
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