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Alo Jokes

What do you get when you cross an aloe vera plant with a dachshund?

A succuweenie.

I went to an English pharmacy and asked the guy, “Do you have anything for dry skin?”

Pharmacist: Aloe.

Me: Uhh. Hi. Do you have anything for dry skin?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roses are Red, Cacti are Thorny

When I’m around you, you make me very… happy!

I guess what I’m trying to say is aloe you very much.

What should you tell an English politician who's badly sunburnt?

Aloe, gov'na

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why is it always crowded in a sperm bank?

Because people are paid to come.
Why'd you think sperm donations are really expensive, because they're handmade
But Its hardwork tho, it takes alo of balls to do it, whatever you thing you on regular that's nutting.

So I was out Christmas shopping earlier today, decided to stop in at the local garden section to pick out some succulents for my wife, tripped over a hose and ended up falling into the Aloe Vera.

Hurt like hell, but healed very quickly.

Plant joke

What did one British succulent say to the other? Aloe mate!

What does a Hawaiian comedian put on a sunburn?

Aloe-Ha!

Adele wrote a smash hit song after getting sunburned...

Aloe from the other side

Did you hear Adele got a really bad sunburn?

She details the experience in her new song, "Aloe From the Other Side"

How do they answer the phone at the burn center?

Aloe

How do you treat a sunburn in Hawaii?

With Aloe-ha Vera!

If olive oil is made from olives and coconut oil is made from coconut what is baby oil made from?

Mineral oil, Aloe Vera Extract, Vitamin E, Fragrance and false advertising.

What do Australians use for sun burns?

Aloe, mate.

I'm sorry

A islamic dial ripoff made a new type of hand soap.

Aloe Akbar.

Oh, Jim...

Jim goes to the Doctors about a rash. "Doc, I've had this rash on my chin for 2 weeks now. I've tried everything; aloe vera, tea tree oil, vaseline. Nothing works."

The Doctor says "Oh I've seen this before"

"You have?"

"Yes. I had the exact same thing last week. I was going dow...

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