This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What a the difference between a blimp and 365 blowjobs?

One's a good year, and the other's a great year!

What happens when you attach stew to a blimp?

Soup rise!

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A pilot, a captain, and a driver were all stuck in a blimp headed straight towards a city.

The pilot, wanting to save himself from crashing, says “let me steer this blimp off course and land us safely. As a pilot, I have years of experience controlling flying vehicles. A blimp surely can’t be much different from a plane.”

The captain then butted in and said “No, let me take the whe...

What do you call a blimp with lots of light-emitting diodes?

LED Zeppelin

How long does it take to get your blimp license?

A GoodYear or so

The other day a blimp told me he contained a perfect vacuum

I told him he was full of hot air

Does anyone know how much a blimp is worth?

I was going to google it, but I was worried it wouldn't account for inflation.

A small passenger blimp is going down...

A small passenger blimp is going down and has no place to land safely. In attempt to keep to in the air long enough to land, its cargo is dumped.

The blimp is still going down, however, and through quick calculations it is realised that four average-weighted passengers would need to sacrifice...

There's a Mexican, An American and a Canadian on a blimp...

The blimp starts falling out of the sky, so the three men start throwing anything they brought that they don't need.

The Canadian says, "there's too many of these in my country," and throws a bunch of hockey sticks out of the blimp.

The Mexican says, "There's too many of these in my c...

I wanted to have a blimp of my own

But it is so above my reach due to all the inflation!

Why did the rookie technician allow a German zeppelin to fly over Allied airspace?

It was just a blimp on the radar.

The weather is so bad today, it's raining cats and dogs

Maybe a PetSmart blimp wasn't such a good idea after all

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