Third magic trick now perfected.. transforming myself into toilet paper.

I'm on a roll!

Are we even watching the same movie?!

One thing I’ll never do again is watch a movie with a genius. You, me, us normal people, have a thing called suspension of disbelief. When we watch a Harry Potter movie we don't get lost when they shoot lighting out of their little wand. We're in, we get it. Magic. Got it! Light up the screen! I'm i...

What do you call a robotic transforming Malaysian airliner?

If it's evil, a Deceptigone. If not, an Autobottomoftheocean

Shamelessly stolen from [here](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/38i70d/what_would_be_the_worst_machine_that_a/crv9i7p)

Tung was out for a walk on a hot day.

The sun was shining, and the clouds were absent. During his walk, he discovers a man with 2 gorillas by his side. Dumbfounded, Tung asks, “I can’t help but notice you have 2 gorillas there. I was curious as to why.” The man looks up and exclaims “I’m selling them! 100 silver each.” Suspicious, yet i...

Three vampires are discussing who is the most powerful.

Three vampires are in a castle in Transylvania discussing how strong and powerful they are. The youngest of the group slams his fist on the table and exclaims, "I am the fastest out of us three! Watch this!"

He bursts out the window transforming into a bat and flies towards a small village....

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