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Traders Jokes

What type of wine do traders drink?

ImPORT/ ExPORT

What do Russian stock traders and Military vehicles have in common

They stopped working

What do you call it when stock traders take over your home?

An investation

Two traders go to the beach.

They lay their beach towels on the sand and while one watches the boats out on the water, the other one decides to take a nap.

After a while, the first one notices the waves come closer and closer to their towels. He says to his friend :

\- Hey... the tide's rising, we should move furt...

How do crypto traders call no nut november?

HODL it

Now that New York's in lock down, what will the Wall Street traders be doing?

Insider trading.

Where do slave traders go to work?

The black market

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are stock traders so good at sex?

Same principal, you gotta pull out at the right moment or it costs you.

What happens when corn traders in the commodity market indulge in greedy but lame practices to profit?

Corny capitalism

Today in History class we learned that evil slave traders used to lure and capture Kalahari bushmen by speaking their language to draw them out in the open.

A terrible, early form of click bait.

Once upon a time, there was a trainee fortune teller...

Once upon a time, there was a trainee fortune teller called Sarah who hoped to learn the proper skills of divination by training alongside a renowned fortune teller, Madame Lointain (for, in these times, it was customary for each village to have a fortune teller).


After having studied for...

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