The Empire was finally successful with destroying The Force

All they had to do was vaccinate for midichlorians

Why is duct tape similar to The Force?

It has a dark side, a light side, and it binds the galaxy together

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I wish the Force was real.

If I'm gonna remain a virgin, might as well have cool powers and a laser sword.

What do you call a Sasquatch who uses the Force?

A yedi

How did the Mexican chef become the best cop on the force?

Consistency. He always finished a case a dia.

Why don’t Jedi parents let their kids use the Force at the dinner table?

Like any other parents, they believe children should not be Force-fed.

"Noun; the force that attracts objects towards the center of a celestial body."

"Very nice, Elphaba, but I said '_defy_ gravity'"

TIL France got a different version of The Force Awakens than the rest of the world.

While the international version ends with Rey and Luke, the French version ends with fin.

May the force be...

... Equal to Mass times Acceleration.

which TV/movie character can use the power of the force and the power of potassium?

Bananakin Skywalker!

The Force is like a priest

It surrounds us, it penetrates us, it has a powerful effect on the weak minded

Which soft drink is one with the force?

The Fanta Menace

I know how the Force Awakens ends!

Credits.

“May the force be with you.”

“And also with you,” said the Catholic Jedi.

Watching Solo die was my favorite part of The Force Awakens....

Han's down.

"Update the force, Luke"

Adobe Wan Kenobi

What was Mark Hamill's reaction when he finished reading The Force Awakens script?

Speechless

Last night in bed, I nudged my wife and said, “Honey, I think The Force Awakens!”

She said, “Thanks for the heads up, Hand Solo.”

What type of objects do not accelerate, regardless of the force applied?

Letterhead and envelopes. No matter how hard you try, they remain stationery!

What would you call a terrorist organisation run by wielders of the dark side of the force?

ISITH

I felt a great disturbance in the force today:

Millions of parents quietly rejoiced while their children cried out in terror and were quickly silenced by their new homeroom teachers.

Hey girl are you the force of gravity?

Because I'd rate you a -9.8

What would Steve Urkel say if he used The Force?

Jedi do that?

An Acadian, a Newfie and a Quebec'er were walking down the beach when they they found a Genie's lamp

The Genie said that he would grant them each one wish. The Genie turned to the Acadian and asked "What will be your wish?"

The Acadian said "Well, I had to start working out West and they don't speak a lot of French there, so it would be nice if they would accept me for who I am."

Th...

What do you call the connection between a family of Force users?

The Force Kin.

I like them thicc af

"But Sir Newton, we can't write that!"

"Then write this: the greater the mass, the greater the force of attraction"

A retired Army General moves into a new apartment after quitting service.

Over the next few weeks, his new neighbors realized that on the weekends he would return to his apartment at 2am very drunk, remove his left boot and slam it on the floor, remove his right boot and slam it on the floor even harder and then go to sleep. Since the force of these thunderous slams was e...

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I ran into the gas station with my mask on saying, "This is a Stick Up!"

The clerk laughed.

The man paying for a coffee laughed.

The lady grabbing a candy bar laughed.

They thought I was joking, so I quickly made a small purchase.

When the cashier had the drawer open, I said hand me the large bills and a carton behind the counter.

The c...

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Bob, an Olympic class wrestler - has a match with Bjorn, a Lapland wrestling grandmaster

Before the meet, Bob's coaches warned him that Bjorn has a deadly stranglehold move called "the pretzel". They warned him not to dip his right shoulder while standing face to face, or he will certainly lose.

Bob keeps this advice in mind as he wrestles Bjorn - but he loses concentration for ...

This cop had just finished his shift one cold July evening and was sitting at home next to his wife.

"You won't believe what happened this evening, Hallie. In all my years on the force I've never seen anything like it."
"Really?" She says. "Tell me what happened."
"Man, I came across these two dudes down by the river. One of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating firew...

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