A man is obsessed with reeling in a big fish... A man is obsessed with reeling in a big fish, so much so that he eventually buys a huge, synthetic sturgeon and hangs it on the wall above his fireplace.

Eventually, however, looking at the fake trophy makes the man feel like a fraud, and he can't stand it.

One day, he makes a final attempt at fishing up something impressive. Finally, after hours of waiting, he reels in a record-breaking chub, one that weighs more than any other in recorded hi...

I created a poll to see if people preferred pillows stuffed with bird feathers or pillows stuffed with synthetic material.

Synthetic material didn't win. Too many down votes.

Have you heard about the synthetic stone countertops that are half the price?

Don’t take them for granite.

Why are synthetic fibres like the police?

They don't let you breathe.

What do you call someone who sells synthetic limbs?

An arms dealer

I don't get this new hype around synthetic meats.

I mean, why are we re-inventing the veal?

What do you call synthetic breast cleavage?

Silicone valley

A joke for St. Patricks Day

An Irishman, by the name of O'Malley proposed to his girl on St. Patrick's Day. He gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond. The excited young lass showed it to her father, a jeweler. He took one look at it and saw it wasn't real.

The young lass on learning it wasn't real returned to her futu...

Stalin calls a meeting in the Politburo

To hold a debate on wether there will be money in the Soviet Union. The two main factions, led by Trotsky and Bukharin, represent left- and right-wing views. Trotsky said, "We should absolutely abolish money, the state should be able to provide all of its citizens." Bukharin rises to speak, saying, ...

Makes sense Apple fans would buy a MacBook candle...

...They're already used to the smell of burning synthetic materials and watching their money go up in flames.

What's the difference between PHP and PCP?

One makes you:

* feel numb
* see things that aren't there
* panicked and paranoid
* feel loss of control over your actions.


The other is a synthetic drug.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jokes for the week of 4/6-4/12

A French breast scientist advises against wearing bras after a thorough study, thus tying for the best job ever and the best news ever.

A GOP rep said not gays nor NAMBLA can redefine marriage. Thankfully, nine fabulous people in robes can. ‪#suckit‬ ‪#nohomo‬ ‪#somehomo‬ ‪#yeshomo‬

Ki...

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