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Man Made Jokes

As the man made his way to his seat at the World Cup Final, he couldn't help but feel excited.

But as he sat down by the pitch, he noticed the seat next to him was empty. "What a waste," he thought to himself. "Who would have a seat like this and not use it?"

Curiosity getting the best of him, he leaned over to his neighbour and asked if someone would be sitting there. "No," the nei...

I work in retail, a married man made me laugh

Me: Hi sir, can I help you?
Him: Nah I'm just looking for my wife
Me: Oh sorry, we don't sell wives here
Him: Good! Else you'd get a lot of returns!

What do you call a man made out of iron

A Fe-male

A man made an illegal U-turn at a red light when taking his son to school. He said, “Oh no! I have made an illegal U-turn!”

The son replied, “It’s ok, dad. The police car behind us did the same thing!”

A man made a car.

Unlike other cars, the entire thing was made of wood. The wheels, the steering wheel, the seats, etc.
One day, he decided to try it out. But for some reason,













it wooden work.

Three men were buried under a landslide in China

Three men were buried under a landslide in China.

They're inside a car when it happened, and miraculously still have cell phone connection.

The first man made a phone call to the police:

"I'm a good citizen and husband, please come save us!"

The police tell him they will ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Man made climate change is really annoying me!

I wish the jerks that keep changing the climate would just set it at 70 degrees Fahrenheit year round and be done with it!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One day a man made a schedule for his wife.

He said that she had to strictly follow it or he would divorce her. It told her when to wake up, make breakfast, do the laundry, make dinner and when to have sex. Some time later the man went out drinking against his wife's wishes, so she called him and said: "I have a strict schedule and i will fol...

A man made a bet at a bar...

A man made a bet at a bar that he could touch a fur and then tell what animal it was and how it was killed. For every one he got right he would get a beer.
the bartender blindfolded him and handed him a fur.
- Elk, shot with a remmington rifle.

the bartender handed him another fur.
-...

Did you read the book about the man made of uranium?

In the end, they reveal it was U all along!

A man made a motorcycle out of wood. Wood interior and exterior, but did he ride it?

No it wooden start

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is only two man made objects visible from space. The great wall of china and,

Kim Jong Un's giant ass.

cmon guys I cant do this all by myself.

On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife.

The certificate paid for a visit to a herbalist living nearby, who was rumoured to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.


After some discussion with his wife, the man made a visit to the herbalist and handed his voucher over wondering what he was in for. The elderly herbalist han...

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