UPJOKE
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Sterile Jokes

What did the sterile australian say to his wife that wanted kids

Im afraid i cant mate

Me and my wife have been artists together for ten years, and suddenly she splits up with me because I’m sterile?

I’m drawing a blank here.

I tried incubating some chicks but turns out my rooster is sterile.

Oh well.
No harm, no fowl.

What's the difference between having a vasectomy and being naturally sterile?

There's not a vas deferens

I had always thought becoming sterile through testicular trauma was the same as having a vasectomy

Turns out, there's a vas deferens

I showed my sterile friend a photo of my son.

He just couldn’t conceive of such a thing.

Why was the sterile Grizzly upset?

Because he couldn't Bear children.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do a Christmas tree and a sterile man have in common?

Their balls are for decoration only.

After Mrs. Jacobs found out her husband was sterile, the couple decided to hire a proxy father to start their family.

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Jacobs kissed his wife and said 'I'm off to work, Lydia. The guy should be here soon.'

Wouldn't you know it, a door-to-door baby photographer came by half an hour later, hoping to make a sale. Mrs. Jacobs answered the door. 'Good morning, ma'am. ...

What does the sterile man say when asked if he's gonna get neutered?

Vas the deferens?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Someone asked me if I'd ever given a sterile guy a blowjob, so I racked my brain trying to remember if I had.

Alas, I just kept drawing blanks.

What does a scalpel have in common with a woman who had a hysterectomy?

They're both sterile.

I just came back from the doctor, he told me I'm never going to be able to have children...

I asked him if I'm sterile, he said "No, you're just THAT ugly"

I like my men like I like my catheters

Sterile and disposable.

A young couple gets married

A young couple gets married. Very quickly, the wife decides that children would be a blessing. The man nervously agrees.

For weeks they try to have a baby, making love almost every night. The man always seems on edge after each attempt and his wife gets suspicious. She suspects he is cheating...

A man is standing at the office water cooler...

...Talking animatedly telling his coworker he found that his girlfriend was poking holes in his condoms. He elbows the other guy and says "luckily I found out years ago I'm sterile, really dodged a bullet there."

The other guy scoffs "is it really dodging bullets if you're shooting blanks?"

A funny thing happened at the lab

A seventy-four year old medical researcher went to the doctor after having a seeming unexplainable illness that had lasted for several days.

After describing her symptoms, the doctor performed a series of tests and then reached a diagnosis.

The doctor said, "I am not sure how to tell y...

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