This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

I told my girlfriend that the milkman said he had shagged every woman in our building except one!!

โ€œI bet itโ€™s the snooty bitch at number twenty three,โ€ she replied.

I put down a sizable deposit on a new Mercedes yesterday.

Thatโ€™s what that snooty dealership gets for telling me their bathrooms are for customers only.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A woman is cooking dinner and her husband walks in the door, shaking his head and laughing...

"You'll never believe the bullshit I heard at work today. Bill Jenkins was bragging that he's fucked every woman on our street but one."

His wife smirks, stirring the gravy. "I bet it's that snooty old Cathy Anderson."

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

The Royal we.

Queen Elizabeth and princess Kate are out motoring through the hillside when the Bentley they're driving breaks down. The driver has to go look for help, and while he's gone some ruffians come across the disabled royalty.
"Ain't you the queen?"
She confirms she is.
"Where's your tiara?"...

One evening a husband comes home to his apartment...

...and he's very roughed up. When his wife sees him she asks, "What happened to you?"

"I got into a fight with the apartment complex manager."

"Whatever for?"

"He said he had slept with every woman in the complex except one!"

The woman replied, "I bet it's that snooty Mrs...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Joe comes home from the factory laughing.

He says to his wife, "Hey, honey! You know that guy Bill Henry? He claims he fucked every woman on our street except for one! Can you believe that shit?"

His wife wipes a dish and puts it into the cupboard. "I bet it's that snooty old Sally Jenkins..."

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

I was listening to the radio this morning and they're having a contest. The radio show challenged listeners to name a single word that he can't spell...

After a few failures to stump him, there's a call from some redneck-sounding old guy. The host is all cocky by now, "Okay, give me your word, let's see what ya got..."
"Goan," Says the caller.
"All right, that's new. And can you put it in a sentence?"
"Yep... Goan fuck yer self! Hahah...

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