What do you call a snobby criminal walking downstairs?

a condescending con descending

do you know how they lined up the snobby prisoners?

they did it in con-descending order

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So I go hunting with a bit of a snobby friend of mine...

On a nice summer day I go hunting with my snobby friend (his first time) on the countryside. Almost 6 hours pass and we haven't seen a single bird before we see this pheasant running out of a cornfield into this grass field. My friend doesn't hesitate and and shoots the bird.
My friend runs up to...

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An snobby woman stops at a local diner while traveling...

and orders a coffee. Trying to start a conversation, the waitress asks, "So, where are you from?"
"Where I am from, we do not end sentences with prepositions." the woman replies.
The waitress apologizes and tries again, "So, where are you from, Bitch?"

What did the snobby bird say to the poor bird?

*Cheep, cheep.*

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A high-class London lawyer gets stopped by police...

A high class stuck-up London lawyer gets pulled over by traffic police for failing to stop at a stop sign.

Officer: 'License and registration please'

Lawyer: 'Why?'

Officer: 'Because you failed to stop at the stop sign back there'

Lawyer: 'But I slowed down and could see ...

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[LONG]ish A man's trimming his hedges as the postman walks by...

He gives a friendly hello and then realises this is the perfect moment to ask a question that's been bugging him for some time.

"Is it true what they say, that you lot sleep with the housewives whilst the husbands are at work?"

"Ha! It is indeed. I've had every woman on this street, e...

Good old Irish Granny....

Solicitors should never ask a County Offaly granny a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial in Tullamore recently a small-town prosecuting solicitor called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Murphy, do you know m...

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