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Three racehorses and a racing dog are together after a day of racing.

The first horse says: "You guys won't believe what happed to me in the race today! I was taking my time at the race I was like 12th or 13th not caring too much. And then I suddenly felt a sting on my ass, I sprang forward and before I realized I fished the race 1st."


The second horse sa...

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Three racehorses were standing around their paddock

The first one says, "I've won 15 of my last 26 races."

The second one says, "I've won 20 of my last 30 races."

The third one says, "I've won 25 of my last 40 races."

A greyhound happens to be walking by. He stops and says, "I don't mean to brag, but I've won 68 of my last 70 ra...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So some racehorses are chatting in the stables. When one starts to boast of his track record. "Out of my last 15 races, I've won 8!"

"That's nothing, I've won 19 of my last 27," said another.

"Oh that's good," says an older horse. "But out of my last 36 races, I've won
28!"

At this point the racehorses notice that a greyhound had been siting silently,
listening into the conversation. "Excuse me gentlemen. But ...

The two best racehorses in the country.

There were these two racehorses, Galem and Gollum. They were raised together and had been racing side by side their entire lives. Everyone loved to watch them. They were always faster than the other horses; as a matter of fact, they were the best racehorses in the country.



As good as ...

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There are 3 racehorses sitting in a bar

Called James, Jimmy and Johnny.

James turns to Jimmy and says, "Say, last week I was in a big race and I was losing by miles! But then suddenly, I had a massive pain in my ass and it shot through my whole body and through my mouth and woah! I was in front and I won!"

Jimmy replies, "Cr...

Two racehorses and a dog are in the stable on the night before the big race.

The old horse says, “Kid, I have a favor to ask. Tomorrow’s the last race of my career. If I win, they’ll have a big parade in my honor and put me in a nice pasture for the rest of my life. If I lose, they’ll send me to the glue factory. Now, I’m still a pretty good racer, but I think we both know t...

I used to own a pair of racehorses, named one-one & two-two. One-one won one race

22112

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Three racehorses are in the stable after race day...

The first horse says to the other two "You know something funny, today I was wearing number three in my race and I came third"

The second horse raises his eyebrows (?) and says "Weird, really weird. I was wearing number two today and, would you believe it, I came second in my race".

Th...

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An old Justin Wilson joke

An old, crotchety farmer woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. The man clutched his chest and fumbled for the telephone to call an ambulance, fearing that he was having a heart attack.

Upon arriving at the hospital, the man, stable but still in quite a bit of pain, was greeted ...

Kentucky Derby joke

Two racehorses are in a bar getting drunk.

The first one says: "In 100 starts, I got 85 firsts, 10 seconds and 5 thirds."

The second racehorse says: "Well in 100 starts for me, I got 90 firsts, 7 seconds and 3 thirds."

They begin fighting about this.

The bartender, a grey...

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