UPJOKE
nounpersonal pronounadjectivepart of speechverbadverbinfinitivegenitivereferentantecedentgrammarlinguisticsanaphorademonstrativerelative pronoun

Pronoun Jokes

TEACHER: Today you'll give an example of a pronoun each and form a sentence with it.

JOHN: HER

TEACHER: Ok, your sentence?

JOHN: Give her her book. It's hers.

TEACHER: That's good. Yes who's next?


DAVE: HIM

TEACHER: Your Sentence?

DAVE: Give him him book. It's hims.

A supermarket greeter gets a new job at Asda

About two hours into his first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. He said pleasantly, “Good morning and welcome to Asda. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?’
T...

What’s a male Jewish New Zealanders pronouns?

He/Brew

What are Snoop Dogg's pronouns?

Hizzle/shizzle.

What are a trans parents pronouns

Who/where

My wife was fussing at me for using the wrong pronouns with her.

I was like, “Dude...”

“You over there, give me an example of a pronoun.”

“Who, me?”

“Correct. Well done.”

Are there a lot of first-person singular objective pronouns…

…or is it just me?

I now identify as invisible

Although I was born visible, I am now trans-parent. My pronouns are who/where

What are a male donkey’s pronouns?

He / haw

My preferred pronoun is "letter"

I was born female, but I identify as mail

What pronouns do Amber Heard’s lawyers prefer?

Hear/say

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife, to our therapist: He always misunderstands simple questions.

Therapist, to me: What does she mean?

Me: It’s a feminine pronoun,

I'm a cowboy but my pronouns are

Ye/Haw

I got an email today from someone, and in their email signature, they put their pronouns "them/they"

So when I responded, I hit "reply all"

My pronouns are Rare/Medium Rare.

And if you don't use these, my feelings and mental health is at steak...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On our first date, I politely asked the girl for her pronouns.

It turned out they are fuck/off.

People complain that using "they" as singular pronoun will make things confusing.

That sounds like a "you" problem.

I saw a couple of adjectives and a pronoun nervously smoking outside court yesterday.

Probably awaiting sentencing.

A man walks into an LGBTQ centre.

He walks up to the front desk and introduces himself. "Hello, I identify as a chocolate bar. Can I join?"

The receptionist replies "Sir, that's disgraceful! You're mocking the community. We're going to have to ask you to leave."

"You can't call me sir!" The man exclaims. "I use her/she...

Give me two examples of a pronoun.

Who? Me?

A lollipop asks a chocolate bars pronouns.

The bar says its prounouns are her/shey

Whenever someone asks me my pronouns

I tell them I just get by with the amateur ones.

My wife and I was arguing about which personal pronoun was the best.

I won.

What do you get when you cross a vegetable with a pronoun?

Beets me.

How is a girlfriend like a pronoun?

Your's is possessive

What pronouns did Julius use?

Ze/Zir

Yo mamma so fat, her preferred pronoun is

There

I only use one pronoun set.

You/people don't seem to appreciate it

Is there more than one singular first person objective pronoun?

Or is it just me?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"I just deleted all the German names off my phone."

***"It's Hans free"***

*Funniest joke at this years Fringe by Darren Walsh.*

**The rest of the top ten.**

2 -"Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse ... but enough about Kanye West" - Stewart Francis

3 - "Surely every car is a people carrier?" - Adam Hess

4 - "...

What's Michael Jackson's preferred pronoun?

Hee hee

What did the candy bar say when you asked for their pronouns?

Her/she

What pronouns do comedians use?

He/he/he

Yo mama so fat

her pronouns are Hershey

Did you hear what Emma Watson's new pronouns are?

(Her, My & He)

what is a male vampire's pronouns in the sunlight?

he/hiss

I told my Italian housemate that "I'm not a materialist", he asked "is that a pronoun?",

I replied "no, it's more anti noun"

[OC] What pronouns are widely embraced by the folks in Texas?

Heeee / haaaa

What are a Jamaican persons pronouns?

I and I

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

i sexually identify as a donkey

my pronouns are he/haw

What’s a sheep farmer’s pronouns?

She/ar

What pronouns do serial killers go by?

Man/slaughter

I'm changing my pronouns to "Almond Joy/Mounds"...

...because sometimes you feel like a nut, and sometimes you don't.

What are the pronouns for someone who identifies as an attack helicopter?

Apache/Apachim

I now identify as boring.

My preferred pronouns are ho/hum.

My uncle's joke he just came up with: What are chocolate's preferred pronouns?

Her, She

What are Dolores Umbridge’s pronouns?

*Hem/hem*

What do you call…

a sunburnt person trying to decide which personal pronoun would be best to use?
Reddit.

What are a non binary redneck’s preferred pronouns?

Y’all and all y’all

I don't believe in pronouns,

They made me fail English

What are Perry The Platypus’ pronouns?

Do Be Do/Be Do Bah

Did you see in the bathroom that they have complimentary pronouns?

I took a she/it.

What pronouns does Rosemary like to go by?

She/Herb.

What do you get when you combine silver, a personal pronoun, a tattoo, and the short form of Edward?

What do you get when you combine silver, a personal pronoun, a tattoo, and the short form of Edward?

Ag I tat Ed.

I'm veeeerrrryyyyy agitated.

What would a donkey's pronouns be?

Hee-Her

Husband: What's your most hated part of the english language?

Wife: The singular second person personal pronoun.

Husband: What?

Wife: YOU.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What pronouns does a person who sexualy identifies as Michael Jackson use?

He/heee

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Grammar of F***

Transitive Verb: "I want you to fuck me until I can't walk."

Intransitive Verb: "We fucked until my dick fell off."

Phrasal Verb: "I'm going to royally fuck you up."

Noun: "That guy is such a dumb fuck."

Pronoun: "Look who fuck-face over there brought to the party."
...

I am tired of keeping track of so many pronouns. Apparently now they have specific pronouns for Russian army....

was/were

Lucky Pronouns.

Teacher :Sammy, can you give me 2 pronouns?

Sammy : Who? Me?

Teacher : Very good. That's correct!

What pronouns does a Chicagoan use to identify as non-binary?

Dey or dem

I added pronouns to my tinder profile last night.

I'm now known as he/him/yes officer that's the one.

It's no wonder women love chocolate so much. Their pronouns give it away.

Her/she

Let me tell you a little about myself...

It's a reflexive pronoun that means 'me'...

Teacher: Name 2 pronouns

Student: Who, me?

(And that's it!)

I'm Jewish and Nonbinary.

My pronouns are oy/they.

What do you call a noun that is very good at its job?

A pronoun

I'm a comedian ..

My pronouns are 'he he'.

My friend is a nonbinary time traveler

Their pronouns are they/then

I'm still learning my pronouns...

But that is neither here nor there.

My grade school teacher said to me "Name two pronouns".

Only half paying attention to the lecture, I replied "Who, me?"

What is a pronoun?

Yes. It can also be an adverb.

It's important to distinguish pronouns from verbs

That is, if you want to use damn well

Why did the bird refuse Martin Luther's food?

It was on a strict diet of worms.

A lot of people think Michael Jackson's Pronouns were He/Him, but in reality,

Michael's preferred prounouns were He/He

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