The Hero: I'm on a quest to avenge the death of my Father!
The Paladin: You have my sword!
The Elf: And my bow!
The Dwarf: And my axe!
The Necromancer: And your father!
A Paladin takes his car to a mechanic
A Paladin takes his car to a mechanic. "Whenever I'm driving, I get these strange urges to run over pedestrians."
The mechanic has a look under the car. "Your alignment is off."
How many Paladins does it take to install a ceiling lamp?
Two, one to the screw the bolts in and the other to uphold the light.
A Paladin goes into a mechanic's shop...
A paladin goes in to a mechanic's shop, and says "Hey, you've got to help me. Normally, I'm a perfect, upstanding paladin. I help old ladies cross the street, I tithe, I slay evil demons. But when I get in my car, I only have the urge to cause property damage and run people over. What's going on?"...
A paladin and a warrior go into a mage's electronics store to buy computers.
The paladin asks for a Dell computer. The mage directs him to aisle five. The warrior asks for a Hewlett-Packard. The mage says "I'm all out of HP." The mage dies.