My partner had a go at me because at night, unaware, I go on about Hobbits, Rings and Orcs.
They think I'm Tolkien in my sleep.
What type of oil do orcs use in their machinery?
Mordor Oil
I walked into a disco, and there were Orcs, Trolls, and Nazgûl doing their best moves.
It was Mordor on the dance floor.
Where do Orcs go to school?
Uruk-Hai
How do Orcs of Mordor preserve their meat?
They use Sauron wrap
Why is it ok to hack Cthulhu in as a recruitable hero in a fantasy RTS to defeat the orcs?
Because all's fair in Lovecraft and Warcraft.
What did Gimli say to Legolas when the Uruk-hai marched on Helm's Deep?
That's a LOTR orcs!
Fellowship of the ring
As the fellowship of the ring was being formed Bilbo had been eavisdropping outside of the meeting, not being able to help his curiosity. He had heard young Frodo take upon himself the burden of the ring, Sam, Merry and Pippin joining him on the foolish quest. Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas and Boromir ...
probably won't get him laid
A guy walks into a bar and starts pretending to shoot arrows to a few girls. One of those girls smiles and gets closer to talk: "Hey, I saw that you threw me an arrow." she said while winking at him.
"Yes, I guess I did." came his reply.
"Who are you?", she asked. "Cupid throwing love ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
I think my friend might be gay
I went over to his house to watch Lord of the Rings, anyway do you remember how it begins with Bilbo celebrating his 111th birthday in the shire, reuniting with his old friend, Gandalf, Bilbo reveals that he intends to leave the Shire for one last adventure, and he leaves his inheritance, including ...
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