Old Time Jokes - 10 Hilarious Old Time Jokes

Old Time Story

Old teacher walks with his students down the road.
They see a hole with a bull stuck in it and a man, trying to pull the bull out without any progress.
Teacher waves to his students and in five minutes they help the man, the bull is saved and they keep walking.
A bit later they see an...

In his later years, the Lone Ranger and Tonto were catching up on old times. After awhile the Lone Ranger paused and said “I have some sad news.”

“Tell me, old friend” said the faithful Tonto.

“Well...I recently was diagnosed with Cancer”

“Bad spirits,” replied his old companion.

The Lone Ranger look off into the distance for a minute. “After all your years of wisdom, what do you think I should do?”

“Chemo, s...

I miss the good old times...

when I wassn't alive.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The husband leans over and asks his wife "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?

We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."

Yes, she says, "I remember it well."

OK, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"

"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a cr...

Two old friends are catching up for the first time in a few months.

Dave: How's those memory pills you're on Bill, are they working?

Bill: They're fantastic mate, couldn't be happier. I'm remembering old faces, recalling old times, I'm very happy.

Dave: Hmm, what are they called, I might have to get some for myself.

Bill: Oh, umm, gee, what's th...

Remember the old times in the Internet?

Where men are men, women are men, and

the national security agents are young children.

I ran into my ex at the gym. We ended up talking for so long we didn't even get to our routines for the day. It was just like old times.

We didn't work out.

I heard Abe Lincoln was having a fine old time at Ford's Theater...

that is until he asked John Wilkes Booth for a headshot.

I asked my ex wife if she would like to make love just like old times.

She replied,"Over my dead body."
I said, "Yeah, just like old times."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old time prospector lives 50 miles outside of the only town for a hundred miles

This old timer is well known for only coming in to town once a year, to spend his money on whiskey and supplies, never to be seen again until the next year.

One year, he comes to town, heads straight for the bar, and tells the bartender "set 'em up, I'm celebratin'!"

After he knocks b...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.