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Memories Jokes

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Are people born with photographic memories?

Or do they take a while to develop?

Why the fuck are you morons spending real money on Reddit awards? Fucking STOP it. Reddit admins do NOT deserve any kind of money at all. The just banned 200 odd subreddits - and you fucking halfwits want to reward them for it.

Fuck's sake.

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Memories of my grandma

I grew up with 2 brothers and a sister. Our parents tried their best - but it was difficult for them to make time for each of us as individuals. That's why each of the kids alternated spending a weekend at grandma's every month.

I always looked forward to that Saturday morning breakfast. G...

Why do woman have such bad memories during their period?

Because one day bleeds into the next.

I remember when Grandpa’s memories started to go;

it was the day I caught him urinating with the door open… which is not a huge deal, but it’s annoying when I’m trying to drive.

When Tom Hanks writes his memoir it should be called...

'T. Hanks - For the Memories'

Are people born with photographic memories?

Or do they take a while to develop?

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Convincing your girlfriend that she's crazy is called gaslighting and it's a dick move.

Convincing her that she's a robot with artificial intelligence and implanted memories is called bladerunning and it's a Philip K. Dick move.

Oh the memories

You can tell a woman that she is beautiful 1000 times and she will pay no mind to your comments. But tell her that she's fat, just one time, and she will never let you forget it.

Do you want to know why that is?

Because an elephant never forgets.

Memories

I remember when I was a kid. Dad use to put me in a tire and I'd roll down the hill. Those were good years.

In animal college, where's the best place to make memories?

The hippocampus.

Four Nordic men with terrible memories took a trip.

Four Nordic men with terrible memories, Finn, Mark, Lan, and Svee, took a trip.

Together, they travelled far and wide - they sipped wine under the Eiffel tower, climbed Kilimanjaro, met elephants in Thailand, saw the Hollywood sign in California, road tripped across the US, and ended up in Ne...

Some Memories You Can't Forget

I've always loved waking up to the warm feel of a body cuddled against mine.........Except when I was in prison

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"your happiest memory..."

TV crew is shooting a reality series in a rural and mountainous area and they decide to interview this older man, John, who had lived there all his life. They ask him all sorts of questions, when finally the reporter says: "John, please explain to our viewers at home what your happiest memory is, a...

Memories

An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired. Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they’d shared...

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Why Would She Destroy 100 years of Memories?

This morning my wife was destroying her inherited, four-generations old, heirloom dining collection. When asked why, she replied, "Fuck China!"

An old couple are starting to lose their memories...

...so they go to the doctor. "You're fine," says the doctor, "but I think you ought to start writing things down so you can remember them more easily."

Later that night, the man and his wife are watching TV. The man gets up and says to his wife, "I'm just getting a snack, would you like one?...

Where do you save your happiest memories?

On Cloud 9

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