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Medicare Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A couple goes to a sex therapist..

The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?"

The man said, "Will you watch us have sex?"

The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.

When the couple finished, the doctor said, "There's nothing wrong with the way you have sex," and charged them $50.

This happened several weeks i...

Where does Sauron go for Medicare?

The I seeeeee youuuuuuuuuu

Either way, the results are not good

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, 'Hello.'

'Mrs. Sanders, please.'

'Speaking.'

'Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as wel...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I asked my girlfriend to dress up as a Doctor during sex

To satisfy my fetish of being able to afford medicare.

A new poll says 69% of Americans support Medicare-for-All...

...which pales in comparison to the 100% of Americans who support “69 for All”

What kind of insurance would Moses have if he was still alive today?

Medicare Part C.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Couple visit a doctor

A couple ask the doctor to test them while they make love.

Doc says, I cannot find anything wrong.

This happens a few more times.

The doctor asks why they keep asking him to test them as they are obviously in good sexual health.

Well, doc. We are both married, not to each...

An older woman was having female problems...

...So she had to have surgery to have her uterus removed. The doctor had just finished the surgery, and the nurse was cleaning up and said, "Um...Doc, we are missing a scalpel. We're gonna have to go back in her and remov--"

The doctor stopped her right there. He said, "No. Don't even wo...

There were 10 in the bed & the little one said...

"These Medicare cuts are ridiculous."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Shah and the Guard

Once upon a time, far away in the ancient land of Persia, the ruler of the country was called the Shah and his wife was known as the Shahnee.

And it came to pass, in the fullness of time, that the Shahnee gave birth to a son, and this son, being the heir to the Peacock Throne was given the ti...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This old, retired couple went to see the doctor regarding sexual problems.

he old man said, "We want to know if we're making love properly. Will you look at us and tell us if we're doing it right?"

"Sure, go ahead," said the doctor.

So the old couple made passionate love and afterwards the doctor said, "You're making love perfectly. That will be $10."

...

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