Medical Marijuana Jokes - 14 Hilarious Medical Marijuana Jokes

If there was a bipartisan push in Congress to legalize medical marijuana for arthritis treatment...

there would be joint support for joint support for joint support.

What's the number one reason for requesting a medical marijuana card?

"I need it for my joints!"

What do conservatives call medical marijuana?

Medi-sin

I think medical marijuana is really good...

... for joints.

I'll see myself out.

Medical Marijuana isn't a new concept.

We've been using smoke to cure things for centuries.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My doctor prescribed me Medical Marijuana and Viagra

Now I sleep hard

Going to open up a donut shop next to a medical marijuana store

I’ll call it glazed and confused

I had an appointment with a doctor's office to get my medical marijuana card the other day...

When asked where I heard of them, I told him my friend reeferred me.

Do you know why doctors are prescribing medical marijuana for arthritis?

Because the definition of arthritis is inflammation of the joints

I need a medical marijuana card for my joint pain!

They're always burning!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A new stipulation which would have allowed medical marijuana to be prescribed for constipation was rejected in Congress today...

The Congressman’s closing remarks were “shit or get off the pot”

A man tells his psychiatrist that he’s depressed.

A man tells his psychiatrist that he’s depressed and that he would like a prescription for medical marijuana. The doctor nods and says, “fine, fine, but first why do you think you’re depressed?” The man replies, “well doc, I don’t have any weed.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

As a Florida resident...

at least I'll have medical marijuana to treat the fucking cancer this election has given me. I won't even need a lighter, seeing as the country is already on fire.

A farmer notices his dairy cows aren't producing as much milk as they used to.

So the farmer decides to sell them to the butcher in town. The farmer and the butcher exchange plesantries and start to discuss prices for both cows. The butcher notices a strange smell and asks the farmer if he smells it too. The farmer says that on his way over with the cows his back started to ac...

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