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Joyce Jokes

Timmy had been dating Joyce for almost 2 months and decided to tell his parents on Thanksgiving break

When he tells his dad, he asks him “wait a moment, is this Joyce, Susan’s girl?

Timmy replied: “yes Susan Thompson, that’s her mom, do you know her”?

His dad said after a deep sigh: “well son, I’m Afraid you can’t date her, see when I was younger I got around if you know what I mean a...

A woman says to her husband,

"You don't know how to do anything for yourself. I cook for both of us. I clean up. I do laundry. I do the finances. You don't know how to do any of that. Now look at our friends Frank and Joyce. Frank knows how to cook, clean, do laundry, and pay bills. If something were to happen to Joyce, Frank w...

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What is the similarity between having sex with a hot German girl and James Joyce's Ulysses?

I fall asleep before they finish.

What was my reaction when my Lit professor asked me to read "Ulysses" a second time?

I reJoyced!

To whoever scribbled over one letter of my James Joyce book cover, I will get revenge.

Ulysse

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Group Therapy

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, Mary, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second Mom, Ann: "...

Nintendo are releasing a Finnegan’s Wake game

You need a special Joyce stick to play it

The Tale of Arnold Chegwin

When Arnold Chegwin was a young man, he decided that he wanted to be a pub.
He loved the pub after spending time in his local, "The Queen's Arms". 'I'd love to be a pub', he would think.
With a roaring fire and everybody inside me laughing away...

As time passed and he grew older, he se...

I'm a middle aged man. I have many friends on Facebook. Some of them are women. I spend quite a bit of time chatting with them. Life is good!

Joyce is one of them.. Very hot, around 30-35 years old. When I'm chatting with her, I lose all sense of time.

One day she tells me "My husband's going out of town on business this Sunday. Why don't you come over? I'll be alone in the house :-)"

"What if he comes back while I'm there?"...

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An original math feghoot.

There are enough people in the world now who require catheters for medical reasons for the devices to have become the targets of fetishes. At least some of these catheter fetishists are also practitioners of free love, and it's not unusual for them to get together with (relatively) large numbers of...

A local prison introduced an English Literature course...

.. during the inmates' free time. The thought behind it was that if the prisoners had lessons on great writers such as Joyce, Hemingway, or Poe it would help them express themselves as well as helping with their rehabilitation back into society. Unfortunately, the program failed. It seems that when ...

Paddy's first day on the job

A bunch of Englishmen see that it's an Irishman's first day on a construction site. Deciding to mess with him, they go "Hey, Paddy, since it's your first day, we want to know if you know your stuff. What's the difference between a joist and a girder?"

Paddy thinks for a moment before sayi...

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