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Gallagher Jokes

Comedian Gallagher, Famous for Smashing Watermelons, dies at 76

He wasn't as good as Smashing Pumpkins, but he made a splash.

Imagine you were friends with Oasis lead singer, Liam Gallagher.

You two grew up together and were the best of friends. That friendship was like no other.

You both bonded over many things, but the hobby you both got into was baseball. You’d both play catch, practice your pitches, and even went to watch pro games together.

During high school, y...

two clean Irish jokes

Gallagher opened the morning newspaper
and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney.

'Did you see the paper?' asked Gallagher. 'They say I died!!'

'Yes, I saw it!' replied Finney. 'Where are ye callin' from?'
...

Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment...

...when Paddy Murphy loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest, and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue playing standing up.
Michael O'Connor looks around and asks, 'Oh, me boys, someone got's to tell Paddy's wife.. Who will it be?'
...

Liam Gallagher, lead singer of Oasis, decides to learn the politics of his home country. So he goes up to Noel and asks-

"What's a Tory, (Morning Glory), weeeelllll??"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'll never forget giving Noel Gallagher his first guitar. He said to me, "What's that knob at the front for?"

I said, "It's Liam, he's the lead singer."

(and because I know I'll have too, UK slang has knob as another word for cock)

Did you hear about Draymond Green's new comedy road show?

It's like Gallagher, but instead of watermelons he only smashes kiwis.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Drunk Guys are Sitting at The Bar

So there's two drunk guys sitting a the bar in New York. They introduce themselves to one another, and the conversation continues:

Drunk #1: "So where you from?"

Drunk #2: "Oh I'm from Dublin, Ireland."

Drunk #1: "No fucking way!"

Drunk #2: "What?"

Drunk #1: "I'm f...

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