UPJOKE
occasionalraresporadicfrequentuncommoninnocuousperfunctoryunwelcomeunaffectedbothersomeannoyingirregularisolatedrarelyunusual

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Man, on a first date: How do you feel about sex? Woman: I like it infrequently.

Man: I see. Is that one word or two?

I go to the gym so infrequently

I still call it James

What do you call a pharaoh who farts infrequently?

Toot-uncommon.

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Infrequently

There was an elderly couple considering living together, rather than getting married. The woman was concerned about sharing the same bed.

She asked her friend, "Well, what about sex?"

The man replied, "Infrequently."

The woman thought for a moment, then asked, "Is that one wo...

I was honored at my dentist's office for "Most Infrequent Visits"

My reward was a gift card and plaque.

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Dirty Old Man Joke #536

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed fi...

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Hot blond is filling out a form. Where it says "sex" she put "Infrequently". The clerk asked her....

"Is that one word or two?"

Two elderly women are talking about their failing love lives. "So how often are you getting it now, Doris?" asks Mabel. "Oh, I like it infrequently these days!" replies Doris.

Mabel asks, "Is that one word or two?"

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Proper old couple

A very proper old British couple had been seeing each other for some time and decided to get married. They began discussing the terms of their marriage, their home, their life together. It was the gentleman who first brought up the topic of sex.

"Well my dear, it seems to me we should broach...

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Two 80 year old singles were talking about sex.

She asked him how often he had sex. He told her it was infrequently. She asked him, “Is that one word or two?”

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An old couple are at the sex therapists office getting counseling.

To gauge the couple the therapist asked how often they like to have sex?
The wife answers for the husband and say's Infrequent.
The therapists asks,Infrequent...is that one word or two?

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Joke by Osho

A man went to see his doctor because he was feeling under the weather. The doctor asked the usual questions such as had the man been drinking or eating too much.
'No,' said the man.
'Well, perhaps you have had too many late nights?' queried the doctor.
'No,' the man replied.
The doctor t...

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Elderly couple getting married

An elderly couple had been going out for some time and decided to get married.

Prior to the big day, the woman asks the gent "What about sex?"

He quickly responds, "Infrequently."

She ponders and then asks, "Is that one word or two?"

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Why God never got a PhD

1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English.
3. It has no references.
4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal.
5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself.
6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since
t...

I told my wife there was a problem with the showerhead...

It was far too infrequent.

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A woman and a man meet at a rapid dating service......

...The man sits down and says, “I’ve only got three questions.”
“OK,” replies the woman.
“Do you like to clean?” he asks.
“I love cleaning,” she replies.
“Great. Do you like to cook for other people?”
“I love to cook,” she says.
“Fantastic,” says the man. “OK, last question. Do you...

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There once live a man named Keith.

Keith’s mother had instilled in him the wisdom of an old adage: “Obsessions are only a problem if you have fewer than two.” To that end, Keith made sure that he always had at least two obsessions on the go. And as the years passed, and Keith married and settled down, two particular passions endured...

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Newly wed 70-year old

Marty is with his fellow septuagenarian friends. During a thoughtful pause between all the joking and grousing he reveals that he and his new bride are having some issues with sex. The friends had previously warned Marty that his bride-to-be only wanted him for his money and now they rallied around ...

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So, there's these two tomatoes who are best friends ...

Ever since they grew up on the vine together, they've been inseparable. They played little league together, they had home room together all through high school, they even double dated to prom and shared a limo. As time went on, though, they slowly lost touch. During university they slowly lost touch...

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