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Sex Shop Shenanigans

A guy started working in a sex shop. The boss said that he needed to leave for a while, and that the new guy would need to take care of the store until then. After a while with no customers, a white woman came in:
\- How much is that white vibrator?
\- 35 bucks.
\- And the black one? ...

Milkman shenanigans

Customer: Are you sure this milk is pure?
Milkman: Yes, because every drop of water I mixed in it was filtered!!

Rich man shenanigans

There was once an extremely wealthy man who was known for his eccentric habits. One fine evening, he sent out an invite to all the young, able-bodied men of his city for a very "special" dinner, promising a grand prize for one lucky soul.

Knowing the rich man's generous nature, a hundred you...

What do you call graveyard shenanigans?

Tombfoolery.

Sin City was a nickname given to Las Vegas because of all of its shenanigans, but do you know about Den City?

It's the degree of compactness of a substance.

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Three idiots, from the Midwest, I’ll have to call them idiots because their shenanigans were exactly that, idiotic...

Nothing to do with them being from the Midwest but more to do with the fact that they were midway into their cups.

One summer day as they lay in a field somewhere, taking in some sun, each with a half drunk bottle of wine in them they began to get bored.

Idiot No #1 says to idiots, #2 ...

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A man receives marriage-saving advice from his buddy on how to hide his drinking shenanigans, and here's how he uses it.

John comes home stumbling drunk with vomit on his jacket.

His wife is tired of this behavior, and gives him an ultimatum, "John, you're my husband and I love you. I don't even mind that you drink. But I swear to god if you come home this drunk again, I'm leaving you."

John nods his he...

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The Three Stooges are spending the night in a haunted house... and get up to their usual eye-poking, nyuk-nyuking, slapstick shenanigans. In the middle of the pie fight, a poltergeist appears. Curly throws a cream pie and it turns around in midair and smacks him right in the face!

He turns to Moe and says, "Hey, I think that ghost must have been from Australia."
"Oh yeah, why?"
"Because it just threw a Boo-Meringue at me!"

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An organ grinder and his capuchin monkey are hired to perform at a local pub

The organ grinder is happily taking requests from the patrons, but his monkey is in rare form on this particular evening. The monkey is dancing around on tables, stealing food, lifting cigarettes, and getting into various other shenanigans. At one point, the monkey hops up on the bar and starts pick...

I was sitting in my house in England, looking at the news

I was sitting in my house in England, Looking at the news.
Hearing about what was being done to people on british soil by Russians infuriated me. I took it upon myself to write a long scathing article about Putin, and how we should stand up to him and not takes these shenanigans any more from him...

An Englishman, a Scot, and an Irishman walk into an English bar...

Credit to my friend for this one.

Everyone orders drinks, and are brought an additional drink for free.

"See?" says the Englishman, "When you order a drink in an English bar, they give you a second one for free."

"That's nothing," says the Scot, "When you order a drink in a Scot...

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A Nazi walks into a bar and finds a guy called Kyle

He sits down, and Kyle tells him 'I bet I can make that dude over there disappear'. The Nazi, after seeing the skull cap on the man, agrees but says 'I don't think it's goanna work'. Kyle ignores this, and waves his hands three times, then points dramatically at him.


Nothing happens.
<...

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A drunk woman stumbles into a bar...

She sits down, and says to the bartender, "Beertender! Gimme a drooble martuni, and put a pickle in it."

The bartender, quite fluent in drunkese, pours her a double martini, drops in an olive, and slides it over to woman. She lights up a cigarette, slams the martini, and takes another drag ...

Mr Connor took his daughter, Anna, to a Vietnamese church....

....in the hopes of getting her to stop her rebellious teenage shenanigans.
Anna obviously resistant, warned him beforehand that she'll go to the church, but she doesn't want to attend the church habitually.
Mr Connor agreed with Anna, hoping the one visit will be enough.
At the front of th...

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I used to bartend for this popular place off a rural highway in my state…

I used to bartend for this popular place off a rural highway in my state. It marketed itself as a tavern, to get tourists to come in and buy a bite to eat, but the locals knew it by the name of the former owner, Pete.

Pete had died a few years before I started working there. His younger broth...

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