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Transgression Jokes

An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God ."

No one moved.

The preacher continued, “Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.”

Again, all were quiet.

Then, slowly, a gorgeous blonde stood up...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men die and go to heaven

The angel ushering them in welcomes them and tells them they can do what they want, but they will be punished if they swear or curse.

One of the men decides to go see the sights of Heaven, traveling an idyllic mountain path, he sees a waterfall more beautiful than anything he's seen on Earth,...

The most cruel punishment

A rabbi is out of town on Yom Kippur. Since nobody knows who he is, he decides to play a round of golf. Up in heaven, God sees him and decides to punish the rabbi for his transgression. However, before God does anything, Moses stops him and says, "Let me take care of this.'' God thinks about it for ...

I Recently I received a parrot as a gift.

The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

I tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else I could think of to "clea...

So, John received a parrot, as a gift.

Now this parrot was the rudest, noisiest, most foul mouthed parrot you can imagine. Every other word out of this parrot's beak was profanity, and strings of filthy insults - absolutely appalling behaviour!

Well, over the course of the next week, John tried speaking to it softy and calmly, pl...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So this golfer goes to confession and tells the priest, "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

The priest says, "Tell me your transgressions, my son."

"Well," the guy says, "I was on the 5th hole last week and I hate to say it but I cursed."

"What happened, my son?" the priest asks.

"So I teed it up and I hit the ball about 40 yards past the hole..."

"And you swore...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A married couple go golfing every year for their anniversary.

During their 50th anniversary outing, the husband says, "Honey, I love you very much but I have to be honest with you. Early in our marriage I had an affair. It was strictly sexual, and it ended quickly."

His wife smiles and forgives him, but after a couple holes says, "Since we're confessin...

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