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Impolite Jokes

What do you call an impolite reindeer?

Rude-olph.

While teaching a class,

A teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question:


"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"


Michael said: "Just a minute I have to go pee."


The te...

What do you call an impolite storm in the Sahara?

Da rude sandstorm

Vomiting in someone else’s house is pretty impolite, but projectile-vomiting in their house...

...is really beyond the pail.

It’s impolite to ask a lady her age.

So, how much do you weigh?

Why is it impolite to say Donald Trump is a racist, con man and a cheat?

Ettiquete dictates you say, "President Donald Trump is a racist, con man and a cheat."

Remember: It's impolite to ask people questions about their sinuses because that's their personal business.

Don't be nosy.

I’ve always felt like asking someone where they live is impolite.

Secretly following them home is much more polite.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A patient walks into a doctor's office...

...seeking a prescription, and he can't help but notice that the doctor's writing on his clipboard with a rectal thermometer.

Not wanting to be rude, the man speaks up politely, "Uh, doc', not tryna' be impolite, but you're writing with a rectal thermometer."

The doctor pulls up his gl...

Why did the man driving stop at every gas station?

Cause it’s impolite to pass gas

I once met a soldier who had never lost a battle.

It was considered impolite to mention that he had never actually fought a battle, either.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Canadian drove into the US in hopes of visiting Orange County.

He stopped at the first gas station he saw and asked the attendant for directions.

“Orange County?!” exclaimed the attendant. “You’re in fucking New York! Get out of my station, you crazy son of a bitch.”

The Canadian left, puzzled by the attendant’s impoliteness. He decided to drive ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Redneck book of manners.....

1. Never take a beer to a job interview.


2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.


3. It's considered poor taste to take a cooler to church.


4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.


5. Even if you're ...

Here's some Lame Game Dev Humour:

So, I used to work at a studio - doesn't really matter where - and there was this one guy who'd always be around. Just around. I didn't want to seem impolite so I never asked what he did. I kept my head down and did my thing, you know. I mostly forgot about him, except for when I'd be working late a...

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