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Helmets Jokes

Stormtrooper helmets

I would wear a stormtrooper helmet everytime I went for a ride on a motorcycle to avoid HITTING anything.

Why don't Harley riders wear helmets?

If you spent $30,000 on a bike and $10,000 on apparel and people still thought you were a dweeb you would be suicidal too!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Firemen

In a small southern town there was a "Nativity Scene " that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen's helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. At a "Quick Stop " on the edge of tow...

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Translated Slovakian joke

A guerilla fighter is caught by the Nazis during the uprising and is being interrogated. In his defence he says: "look my Grandpa was a great fighter, he shot 46 Soviet soldiers, so dont kill me please!" The Nazi guard asks him: "How do you know they were Soviet soldiers?" "Well, they all had SS on ...

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Our smart devices are spying on us, and I have proof!

I used my smart camera to take a dick pic, and within an hour the algorithm started sending me targeted ads for army helmets and bean bag chairs.

I know how to solve the homeless problem and make bums into hard working citizens!

Give them construction worker helmets. They already have the standing around doing nothing part down!

A Russian spy meets the minister of defence...

The Russian minister of defence calls Boris Morozov, the best spy in Russia, to infiltrate the American army and find out why they excel so much in combat.

"Understood" says Boris. " I will infiltrate the US army for a year and then I will come back to motherland with findings"

And so...

Vietnam veteran's hilarious true story

A bunch of US soldiers were marching across a field. One of the guys says to his buddy, "Hey, do you see where we are?" He looks around and realizes they are walking through a massive field of marijuana. The soldiers started breaking off plants and stuffing them into their clothes and their helmets,...

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Why, what, who?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard when he lives in the jungle without a razor?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why does...

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