I have a half sister

I don't know where the other half went

I come from a family of failed magicians

I have 2 half sisters

An old woman passed away. Her 25 children attended the funeral.

The priest spoke of her extraordinary life.

“She married John and they had had 13 children before he passed. Then she remarried. She and her beloved Richard had 7 children. But he sadly died as well. But she married again and had 5 children with Michael. Now she is at rest. Thank you, Lord f...

My 12 year old sister got me with this one.

What do you call a cow with no legs?.......Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with 3 legs?.........Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?......... Your Mom.




Half sister technically. Not the same mom.

One Sunday morning...

One Sunday morning George burst into the living room and said, "Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan."

After dinner, George's dad took him aside, "Son, I have to talk with you. Look at ...

So, did you hear about the teacher ...

... who was discussing different jobs held by parents.

When she called on Little Johnny, she asked, “And what does your father do?”
“Oh, he’s a magician,” replied Johnny.
“Really? What’s his best trick?”
“His best trick is sawing people in half.”
“Wonderful!” exclaimed the...

Interview with a stage magician

* So, what do you do?
* I saw women in half.
* Do you have any family?
* Four half sisters.

Father's Occupation

"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.

"He's a magician, ma'am" said Little Johnny.

"How interesting. What's his favorite trick?"

"He saws people in half."

"Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sist...

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