How many members of the GOP does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None. They only use Gaslight.

The GOP have placed all their chips on Brett Kavanaugh

They don't believe in plan B

The political parties can't agree on what a second economic stimulus package should look like. Democrats want every American to receive a $1,200.00 check, while Republicans favor giving everybody 10 pounds of Parmesean cheese.

The GOP wants to "Make America Grate Again".

The GOP announced a new slogan today...

“We’re not just morally bankrupt, *we’re Roy Mooreally bankrupt!”*

A guy is driving past the White House....

...and he sees that the road is blocked, but they are letting cars through one at a time. There are crowds on the sidewalk, shouting, but he can't hear what's being said.

Finally he gets to the roadblock, and rolls down his window. "What's going on?" he asks.

"Donald Trump has had ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Jews and the GOP?

Jews always pass the bill.

GOP Lemonade Stand

A Republican senator has set up a lemonade stand selling lemonade for a dollar to raise money for his campaign and remind his constituents of “the good old days”. It’s a big success, as many parents and grandparents take their children and grandchildren to show them how they used to make money back ...

Saw a headline that started with "45% of Alabama GOP voters think" ...

... and I stopped reading because that part was surprising enough.

Why doesn't the GOP establishment want Trump as their nominee?

They hate colored people.

What does the GOP stand for?

The Russian national anthem.

The GOP are already polluting our rivers.

Found a Klansman at the bottom of one not too long ago.

How do you get the GOP to support universal healthcare?

Make it for *White* people only.

It's a shame the immigrants and their kids at the U.S. border aren't named Church and State

then the GOP would never separate them.


I don't know why then GOP is so hard on immigration. It's just the second coming of Jesus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men walk into a tattoo parlor...

The first man asks for a tattoo of a four leaf clover on his dick because he loves to fuck Irish girls.

The second man asks for a tattoo of a cross on his dick because he loves to fuck Christian girls.

The third man asks to tattoo the entire GOP Tax Bill on his dick because he loves fu...

I think we can get Republicans on board with climate change initiatives if we just focus on consequences that mean something to them.

I've read that polar ice is melting causing polar bears to migrate south.  They've actually started sharing habitat with grizzly bears and are even interbreeding with them. Now if there's one thing Republicans hate more than science it's interracial marriage. So all we need to do is let them know th...

looking for a great stand up comedy show?

just watch the GOP debate

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jokes for the week of 4/6-4/12

A French breast scientist advises against wearing bras after a thorough study, thus tying for the best job ever and the best news ever.

A GOP rep said not gays nor NAMBLA can redefine marriage. Thankfully, nine fabulous people in robes can. ‪#suckit‬ ‪#nohomo‬ ‪#somehomo‬ ‪#yeshomo‬


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