How do you receive a cremation container

You urn it

Whats the worst joke to hear during a cremation?

Knock knock

My grandfather worked his whole life to be able to afford a nice cremation...

He urned it.

Was at the cremation of and old buddy last week

He was always the funny one. His last joke was to eat a lot of corn before he died, knowing they'd burn him.

Quite the spectacl!

Will moses be at the president's cremation?

To witness another burning bush.

I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.

Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.

Before I die

Before I die I am going to eat a whole bag of unpopped popcorn.

That should make the cremation a little more interesting.

Cremation

My last chance at a smoking hot body

We got my dad the best cremation money could buy.

He urned it.

Antonin Scalia requested cremation in his will, but millions of women will meet tomorrow to discuss if that's really best for his body.

Millions of women will meet tomorrow to discuss if that's really best for his body.

I got fired today because I asked a customer whether they wanted it "raw or well done"

I was informed I should have said "burial or cremation" instead.

Here at Smith Blarney cremation service we make money the old-fashioned way

We urn it.

Tom Hanks, age 103, is on his deathbed...

The doctor at his bedside tells his family: "There's not much we can do at this point.

The family turns to Tom and asks him, "What are your wishes for the funeral, Burial or Cremation?"

Tom Hanks slowly lifts up a finger and points it towards his own body and says his last words .......

When I was a kid, I made a really big sandcastle with my grandma

Unfortunately, I didn't impress anyone at the cremation...

Sand Castle with Grandma

Today, I made sand castles with my grandma, but for some reason, everybody freaked out and called the cops on me.



Next time, I'll do it away from the cremation center.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you do if a girl starts smoking during sex?

Take her out of the cremation chamber.

Knock knock

Knock Knock

Whose there?

Grandad

QUICK, STOP THE CREMATION!

The other day, we took my Grandpa to one of those spas where the fish eat your dead flesh.

It's a lot cheaper than cremation.

An American & his wife are visiting Israel...

The long married couple have been travelling & seeing the sights for a few months.
One day, the man's wife suddenly dies.



At the morgue she is pronounced dead. The mortician says We can bury her here in Israel for $250 or cremate her for $1000.


The husband ponder...

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